tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-39574655728618638372024-03-18T05:12:48.955-04:00This Infernal Racket | my life, after cancerA Toronto-based lifestyle blog by a 2x cancer survivorKayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.comBlogger52125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3957465572861863837.post-14514224465198522962022-11-23T18:10:00.001-05:002022-11-24T08:22:49.283-05:00Dear Diary: Chemo cycle 2<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-cA7qYXlFi7R2yrM_OSvOEx9TkroLGpSH3Jq2Pz4_7SgfQ4qiF9wesiC2TWorHsbHCjRauFQpQ28b70A-cMaZ7STNyhrOVYZUxbE8b7QL4I702Eog4GY4XJXf5zNXponP2Q5DJ41CHdwDb5fwlxjRyoB2sp9dbWGXG6TRQJZfAnIBiMC3NFbSUUSL/s2240/blog-banners-%20(1).png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1260" data-original-width="2240" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-cA7qYXlFi7R2yrM_OSvOEx9TkroLGpSH3Jq2Pz4_7SgfQ4qiF9wesiC2TWorHsbHCjRauFQpQ28b70A-cMaZ7STNyhrOVYZUxbE8b7QL4I702Eog4GY4XJXf5zNXponP2Q5DJ41CHdwDb5fwlxjRyoB2sp9dbWGXG6TRQJZfAnIBiMC3NFbSUUSL/w640-h360/blog-banners-%20(1).png" width="640" /></a></div><br /><p></p><p><strong>Jan 14, 2015</strong></p>
<p>Today was the start of my second round of treatment. I'm feeling generally well, a little tired here and there but going strong. My hair is definitely thinning...I'd say I've lost about 40% of my total hair but you can't tell unless you examine my roots. I'm still taking the BioSil, wearing a nightcap, washing it once a week, and keeping it separated and tangle-free. I'm praying that I don't lose it 100% but at this point, I'm not sure if my hair will make it through the next 4 months completely.</p>
<p>I did end up getting a wig (from a gracious donor) that I'm having coloured and cut to match my normal hair. I'm glad I have this in case I need it in the future months. I also have hats which work out because CANADA IS COLD. It was -21 the other day! Otherwise, like I said, I've been well. I did gain 4 pounds...which makes me mad because I am not recommended to work out at all besides walking. So I'm still eating my regular amount and doing nothing 4/7 days of the week. I'm thinking of going to the gym during my good weeks and just walking lightly on the elliptical + some really low-impact muscle work. I feel like a potato and I can definitely notice 4 pounds! </p>
<p><strong>Jan 28, 2015</strong></p>
<p>The second cycle is completed! I'm feeling alright, I seem to always get sick the night of chemo and then I am totally fine. Weird. I STILL HAVE A FULL HEAD OF HAIR THANK THE GOOD LORD! I'm feeling optimistic about everything and my hairdresser has dealt with this a lot and doesn't think I should worry about losing everything, PHEW. I did get my hair cut, so my hair just sits on my shoulders now! Super Cute!</p><p>I noticed this time during chemo, that I feel kinda queasy during the treatment itself, like looking at the equipment and tools and drugs make me feel uneasy. Also, you can totally feel the 'cure' being pumped into you and it makes you feel cold...I don't like it..and to be honest, from this point on I am dreading going to each session...sigh. On the bright side, I'm 1/3 done.</p><div class="blogger-post-footer">All Opinions Are My Own!</div>Kayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3957465572861863837.post-3953409188767613062022-11-23T18:02:00.008-05:002023-05-15T09:38:24.409-04:005 days in Alberta<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMfiY0O1z8eKtRGHxNHLAGGo6S7NdRO2A32hb8RLEI3tDkyPiDVlVLviQvTUTHMcWLazojGyL7kfz3lcOa57tZwBDE5y2cWambv2jjEZVu4spOAVV9-AEHqoLCxwSE4xbWZAvffcjkszW9oc71G7tQH0v6-VFllI7Sy09__8Jg2wyWq5pur4qfAQqM/s2240/alberta%20(12).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1260" data-original-width="2240" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMfiY0O1z8eKtRGHxNHLAGGo6S7NdRO2A32hb8RLEI3tDkyPiDVlVLviQvTUTHMcWLazojGyL7kfz3lcOa57tZwBDE5y2cWambv2jjEZVu4spOAVV9-AEHqoLCxwSE4xbWZAvffcjkszW9oc71G7tQH0v6-VFllI7Sy09__8Jg2wyWq5pur4qfAQqM/w640-h360/alberta%20(12).jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><p style="text-align: left;">If you already follow me on Instagram, you'll know that for my birthday this year I finally got to go on one of my dream trips to see Alberta! I had THE BEST time, and it really made me appreciate living in Canada and being exposed to an abundance of beautiful nature. </p><p style="text-align: left;">This blog post will cover touchpoints and spots to visit if you or someone you know is looking for Alberta travel ideas. <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b0c7CJAwbVI&t=1s" target="_blank">PS: Don't forget to watch my Alberta travel vlog!</a></p><p style="text-align: left;"><br /></p></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbuzYoLX9JNbMWAaPLvgSnAtLiTxFOAUjdv4wQqYN4aiWTGURxTGQli-mpYin7aGWFSWE0zS02MwNDCEl44liPsmcjFeV_W9ubDJHgBimdfe35GmtgVQEOgkp4YkyxMz3kyiIjoKSwGEuw5zPIyX-pCZi7HFTTwGv0GWrulgeIw18G1q_M20S1FY12/s2240/alberta%20(5).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1260" data-original-width="2240" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbuzYoLX9JNbMWAaPLvgSnAtLiTxFOAUjdv4wQqYN4aiWTGURxTGQli-mpYin7aGWFSWE0zS02MwNDCEl44liPsmcjFeV_W9ubDJHgBimdfe35GmtgVQEOgkp4YkyxMz3kyiIjoKSwGEuw5zPIyX-pCZi7HFTTwGv0GWrulgeIw18G1q_M20S1FY12/w640-h360/alberta%20(5).jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgafClGVh_QMN9KK7cgPv9CfhJdYEnzFMdCrVytPJrc_8yt-phmyP3oElvJxsdpV2lqx_AHlfs4uAUmSSCUIRWM674RORlsjaVZHzDAjem7qr9YNiCgNKwTAJDjVWY5MYkH89vMdUUp9mHgS1HqsjraT88F4wjMcPtagBiKPUoQ9mmbInTqCrJXpAar/s2240/alberta%20(11).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1260" data-original-width="2240" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgafClGVh_QMN9KK7cgPv9CfhJdYEnzFMdCrVytPJrc_8yt-phmyP3oElvJxsdpV2lqx_AHlfs4uAUmSSCUIRWM674RORlsjaVZHzDAjem7qr9YNiCgNKwTAJDjVWY5MYkH89vMdUUp9mHgS1HqsjraT88F4wjMcPtagBiKPUoQ9mmbInTqCrJXpAar/w640-h360/alberta%20(11).jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br /><p><b><u><br /></u></b></p><p><b><u>Explore Canmore Kananaskis</u></b></p><p>Canmore was the first stop on my list. It's a small town about 1.5 hours from the Calgary Airport and the perfect spot to start your rocky mountain exploration. I stayed at the Silver Creek lodge and it was fantastic. The service was good and the in-house restaurant was gluten-free Japanese cuisine. The lodge is minutes from the main street and budding community. From Canmore, I had easy access to drive to trails, parks and walking paths; overall it's a great first stop on your road trip.</p><p>There are a lot of tourist opportunities but I prefer to figure out my own itinerary. I use an app called <a href="https://www.alltrails.com/" target="_blank">AllTrails</a> and it's great for discovering where to go and what to see. It offers reviews from fellow explorers as well as ratings and seasonal closures/maintenance. It's a must-have for anyone searching for nomadic adventures.</p><p>Downtown Canmore is bordered by the Bow River. The river is an emerald-green, fast-paced river with stunning views of Mount Rundle, an old railroad bridge, and the famous Three Sisters Mountain Range. The main loop only takes 25 minutes but can be extended if you choose. You can access it from town by walking or driving to one of the entrances.</p><p>Downtown Canmore offered many eateries, cafes and boutique shops and the residential parts of town were intertwined so it really created a homely feel. I really enjoyed the simple pleasure of walking through the town and finding little hiking/walking trails throughout the city. You are surrounded by beautiful snow-capped mountains and the sun really warms up the cooler April air. From Canmore, I did a day trip to Banff which I will cover next!</p><p><br /></p><p>Where I stayed: <a href="https://www.silvercreekcanmore.ca/" target="_blank">Silver Creek Lodge</a></p><p>Trails: Bow River Loop / Grassi Lakes Trail / Tree Sisters Viewpoint / Policemans Creek Trail</p><p>Food: Graze Food & Drink / Canary Coffee / Wild Orchid </p><p><br /></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFcLNoGBS3s1U9KeDuRLXboknWzGsul4_FWr2sTQlqssqnYgUiEAtLkbohwAFx3IKdrw4vQQSZPWVELbx54g7NM_Ymc7K1HmKtJd8Wdjt1Ws0X82Fx761QaTRtN4tVG9e5a1XMLRnYUQLfkRzQxGYzQIfDzNh3Rin_QgxFSKRsTy3-pEOBNeEGONrR/s2240/alberta%20(8).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1260" data-original-width="2240" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFcLNoGBS3s1U9KeDuRLXboknWzGsul4_FWr2sTQlqssqnYgUiEAtLkbohwAFx3IKdrw4vQQSZPWVELbx54g7NM_Ymc7K1HmKtJd8Wdjt1Ws0X82Fx761QaTRtN4tVG9e5a1XMLRnYUQLfkRzQxGYzQIfDzNh3Rin_QgxFSKRsTy3-pEOBNeEGONrR/w640-h360/alberta%20(8).jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjAmFxAcZ7SP4qY0_p0v8koXCTF1J9VOykkAo8Rl5E-tIQTnmAYjBjaPIeC0A1kaNsGWBla3PvaDGy5o1sApyj17uM_DaVBWb9Ogxc5x7kSDwp9FZZh48tFkqMdDgc7Zr0zWHYRWAfALBe6y0YOnRgCG_581oAei6hqI1KKafydW2_hl8JRKRukU_6A/s2240/blog-banners-.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1260" data-original-width="2240" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjAmFxAcZ7SP4qY0_p0v8koXCTF1J9VOykkAo8Rl5E-tIQTnmAYjBjaPIeC0A1kaNsGWBla3PvaDGy5o1sApyj17uM_DaVBWb9Ogxc5x7kSDwp9FZZh48tFkqMdDgc7Zr0zWHYRWAfALBe6y0YOnRgCG_581oAei6hqI1KKafydW2_hl8JRKRukU_6A/w640-h360/blog-banners-.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><p><b><u>Day trip to Banff National Park </u></b></p><p>From Canmore, the drive to Banff was about 1.5 hours and offered stunning views of the mountains and local wildlife. You MUST follow the speed signs, the police are very strict and will pull you over if you go over the suggested speed limits, especially in the parks. Parking is affordable and before venturing on a hike, I stopped in town for a quick walk-through and to rent some bear spray. The town has a beautiful lodge/western movie vibe going on. Banff is much more touristy than Canmore so be prepared for more people. </p><p>Originally, I had wanted to hike Lake Moraine but according to AllTrails, it was closed for maintenance. There are so many trails and lakes to see you really can't go wrong with any choice. I decided on Lake Minnewanka. Make sure to rent some bear spray for your hikes, it works on any animal that might be getting a little too close for comfort. ALSO if you are travelling during winter/spring it is a good idea to rent some walking sticks or ice picks for the bottom of your shoes. The trails are still icy and I struggled at Lake Minnewanka and only made it about 1/4 of the hike up due to the steep incline and icy paths. </p><p>If you are looking for more touristy spots then make sure to hit Lake Louise and Lake Moraine! Lake Louise was frozen in April but during the summer months, it's stunning.</p><p>After your hike, stop in the beautiful town of Banff for something to eat and drink. Downtown Banff is super cute, almost like a ski village, and of course, surrounded by the mountains. There is a gondola in Banff that is stunning, however, I decided to skip it and wait until I got to Jasper. I have heard good things about the Banff tram but it does get busy so buy tickets ahead of time!</p><p><br /></p><p>Trails: Lake Minnewanka Lake Trail / Two Jack Lake Trail / Lake Agnes Trail / Shadow Lake </p><p><br /></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitKM51lzrdcmRQlrDTpBnXDS4PTeujO3mtRNzBOmbnez-BFihpIqCDD19zdjigcqgY0kLVdPiqvzfRI0ei5n5QakiYjh75lnaJq46zaMkMDnPL-qz3UAyi2s2GAy7INoX9V2npEP7IAnC4LXmQHSuz2s4oIP9hUcrB4hRNhbIcPK89F_zwvrdrUNia/s2240/alberta%20(4).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1260" data-original-width="2240" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitKM51lzrdcmRQlrDTpBnXDS4PTeujO3mtRNzBOmbnez-BFihpIqCDD19zdjigcqgY0kLVdPiqvzfRI0ei5n5QakiYjh75lnaJq46zaMkMDnPL-qz3UAyi2s2GAy7INoX9V2npEP7IAnC4LXmQHSuz2s4oIP9hUcrB4hRNhbIcPK89F_zwvrdrUNia/w640-h360/alberta%20(4).jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZbRyi0jDmwDDdHDDmMwZMP3dNVzZxHO8hCJM4j9VLSrk9gLhL3RQQ9VINOWm4ZJkc0Ytw-nu5x-TEUmiKaP3fRcKRxvug0Vwx3I96lL_i9fd-k5LeZFhWSnHV6P6IfEEAvIiIRy7QFzcjqShn-t2of8iURzGJWbqUcjFHlrD_zfihXQjDORtiNqk4/s2240/alberta%20(6).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1260" data-original-width="2240" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZbRyi0jDmwDDdHDDmMwZMP3dNVzZxHO8hCJM4j9VLSrk9gLhL3RQQ9VINOWm4ZJkc0Ytw-nu5x-TEUmiKaP3fRcKRxvug0Vwx3I96lL_i9fd-k5LeZFhWSnHV6P6IfEEAvIiIRy7QFzcjqShn-t2of8iURzGJWbqUcjFHlrD_zfihXQjDORtiNqk4/w640-h360/alberta%20(6).jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRuf4emRKrGOPQZbcavfHsom3VKnaImb9VrPiXuFkFNKqJpCy5xyjZJMIL2pgC5q9wL7r9MNzBKEUQNQ8NTH-aiuEFfIHTKJX7OQ_o3-EGjjufSNqovtYFPW6hI-0n-_p3UsjvvEAw3cHF-1vbcr-jCXnlgq1kJ0bTBDUwF7qaumR3eKTVS5FPaqVT/s2240/alberta%20(7).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1260" data-original-width="2240" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRuf4emRKrGOPQZbcavfHsom3VKnaImb9VrPiXuFkFNKqJpCy5xyjZJMIL2pgC5q9wL7r9MNzBKEUQNQ8NTH-aiuEFfIHTKJX7OQ_o3-EGjjufSNqovtYFPW6hI-0n-_p3UsjvvEAw3cHF-1vbcr-jCXnlgq1kJ0bTBDUwF7qaumR3eKTVS5FPaqVT/w640-h360/alberta%20(7).jpg" width="640" /></a></div><p><b><u><br /></u></b></p><p><b><u>Find adventure in Jasper National Park</u></b></p><p>The majority of the drive from Banff to Jasper occurs along the Icefields Parkway. The Icefields Parkway is a 232 km stretch of double-lane highway taking you along the Continental Divide and through the Rocky Mountains. It is absolutely stunning. During the drive, the weather seemed to change every 10 minutes from snow to sun to blizzard to fog. You’ll see mountains and glaciers rise dramatically overhead while wildlife roams freely. TAKE YOUR TIME DRIVING. Do not rush, this is a minimum 3.5-hour drive and full of things to see and places to pull over for stunning views. I also ended up going into British Columbia on a little detour, just for some fun.</p><p>Downtown Jasper is a tiny little gem situated in the bowl of spectacular mountain ranges that tower over and create a snowglobe feeling. I noticed a lot of LGBTQ+ flags and signs in town, which I was happy to see. The city is very small but has many chain and individual restaurants and cute little souvenir shops. Much smaller and more rustic than Banff, and that is how I like it. </p><p>I booked a ride on the <a href="https://www.jasperskytram.com/" target="_blank">Jasper Sky Tram</a> and did the formidable hike up to Whistler's Peak. It was freezing cold and I was underdressed but still had fun and the views were *chef's kiss*. Take your time, altitude sickness is a real thing and did affect me but it doesn't last too long. Obviously in the summer, you do not need to dress in as many layers haha.</p><p>Another hike that I recommend is the <a href="https://www.hikejasper.com/Hiking-Old-Fort-Point-in-Jasper.html" target="_blank">Old Fort Point</a> trail summit which takes you up the side of a smaller mountain. It is not an easy trail but the panoramic views at the top make it worth the steep rugged incline. There was a small herd of mountain sheep at the top, and I got some great shots on my FujiFilm. </p><p>There are not a lot of options for places to stay in Jasper, everything is either a motel or an inn. Tourists who venture to Jasper are there for the outdoors, so the importance of hotels is pretty low on the list. I enjoyed my stay at Mount Robson Inn it included breakfast and an outdoor hot tub with mountain views.</p><p>I would say I saw the most wildlife on the way to Jasper and in Jasper National Park. The animals are very comfortable around people and you can see a lot of them strolling through people's yards on actually in town. Luckily I was also able to see two bears in Jasper which was amazing :)</p><p><br /></p><p>Where I stayed: <a href="https://mountrobsoninn.com/" target="_blank">Mount Robson Inn</a></p><p>Trails: Whistler's Peak, Jasper Sky Train / Old Fort Point Trail / Maligne Canyon Loop / Valley of the Five Lakes</p><p><br /></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeml2JljjVhQ-BRWa4p72v3l-PkX4AlPWVO3vw4QBJFnTUJokaHrfTVulv5hOymqi8EI31-uMhWZwgBChF9cZjZv533v9Gu-6e8dc9O04PZTFievi1cJb4jdOtYggKVQnil1ggIgfCLYZiHBQwG2Lple8m0HyTR-YCtTNwWpgdLut4X2MS7Ioob8Gh/s2240/alberta%20(2).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1260" data-original-width="2240" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeml2JljjVhQ-BRWa4p72v3l-PkX4AlPWVO3vw4QBJFnTUJokaHrfTVulv5hOymqi8EI31-uMhWZwgBChF9cZjZv533v9Gu-6e8dc9O04PZTFievi1cJb4jdOtYggKVQnil1ggIgfCLYZiHBQwG2Lple8m0HyTR-YCtTNwWpgdLut4X2MS7Ioob8Gh/w640-h360/alberta%20(2).jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHnuZM0LdQ8W44XkgMGe4qPvudPemeQ6K93VS1Wtn-FKGVqPl0grgbp4tkHCdphj2xDM5-j0fhQv4Rbbm3JE5HTZsllw10sF70p769x-YHtRsq08H34cDzm50TlX2dpQcFqLjAPjlWesRl9Y3xZGouYiWyBDx-1Cm8W3SAe-YIu-zTgeeDdR0lvIVD/s2240/alberta%20(2).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1260" data-original-width="2240" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHnuZM0LdQ8W44XkgMGe4qPvudPemeQ6K93VS1Wtn-FKGVqPl0grgbp4tkHCdphj2xDM5-j0fhQv4Rbbm3JE5HTZsllw10sF70p769x-YHtRsq08H34cDzm50TlX2dpQcFqLjAPjlWesRl9Y3xZGouYiWyBDx-1Cm8W3SAe-YIu-zTgeeDdR0lvIVD/w640-h360/alberta%20(2).jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgRBU2B5czFlhSvj1bLgiq54ep7Qj1jtxjeitergre8kaPQY2uSiUph1IBi43KUT-QkULY7SGqsHnkhXO2-k4jlXW2kfPZX8quz0fey0zjdCKXsiVwQ0jm-cyuWFGlobLbTEli06yBPnTT1YkO1CFapy43lcIdRrnTOJr-UJvyzHpPaEmKjIukSKOuE/s2240/alberta%20(10).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1260" data-original-width="2240" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgRBU2B5czFlhSvj1bLgiq54ep7Qj1jtxjeitergre8kaPQY2uSiUph1IBi43KUT-QkULY7SGqsHnkhXO2-k4jlXW2kfPZX8quz0fey0zjdCKXsiVwQ0jm-cyuWFGlobLbTEli06yBPnTT1YkO1CFapy43lcIdRrnTOJr-UJvyzHpPaEmKjIukSKOuE/w640-h360/alberta%20(10).jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcvqr-CDCGerb8Gtm_HBx5sPnZNx014tEwvw2w8SRonBIS1mfnXP88dbeDwTtnCIzXryBDPGUFxRznH96tzJaCD7VU4CWbvVvQW9_3HXwLTAdwaPgKo2upoehzBjhn6fGGnUV0y8NPGi_4TjZkhb6Fi_B-5rpkUdvQhyTUys5kwQJUyMBkQo9YSpya/s2240/alberta%20(3).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1260" data-original-width="2240" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcvqr-CDCGerb8Gtm_HBx5sPnZNx014tEwvw2w8SRonBIS1mfnXP88dbeDwTtnCIzXryBDPGUFxRznH96tzJaCD7VU4CWbvVvQW9_3HXwLTAdwaPgKo2upoehzBjhn6fGGnUV0y8NPGi_4TjZkhb6Fi_B-5rpkUdvQhyTUys5kwQJUyMBkQo9YSpya/w640-h360/alberta%20(3).jpg" width="640" /></a></div></div><br /><p><b>An evening in Calgary</b></p><p>After a long road trip through the parks, there and back again, I stayed in Calgary on my final day in Alberta. I have a good friend who lives in the city and really wanted to meet up with him to get a personal tour and catch up! Blair and Ashley met me downtown and we rented scooters to explore the city. Calgary is very small and the buildings are short too! It was a nice change from the towering skyscrapers of Toronto. We scooted through the city and through a super hipster area that reminded me of Kensington Market. The river was beautiful and we got some food before closing up the evening. </p><p>Unfortunately, I didn't get to explore the city too much as my flight was leaving the next day, but I did snag some EPIC breakfast at OEB and I would 10000% recommend you check it out. I also got the chance to walk back through the hipster district and picked up some great tea and some snacks at the local cafes. </p><p>I stayed at a beautiful hotel, The Westley, and would recommend it. Great design and room and VERY comfortable bed + walk-in shower.</p><p><br /></p><p>Where I stayed: <a href="https://thewestleyhotel.com/" target="_blank">The Westley Hotel</a></p><p>Food: <a href="https://eatoeb.com/" target="_blank">OEB</a></p><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjozldF1uwUNvxTgFH1HAnBuEfUCIQ9wou27hzZz-oNsguXHDCFJEB0-O6DfJfD1hQ1Oe5OMXF_DaywAKPKwtnMvz51xjQZmW2wrdB1B732I-PEzvVgutnMmaGbZJCDB52fC_ieoliHWRWf7d4O6_Fvt4GIzst8eFmDeQ1u-JkYDYo4lvTKMwiufkK/s2240/alberta%20(9).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1260" data-original-width="2240" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjozldF1uwUNvxTgFH1HAnBuEfUCIQ9wou27hzZz-oNsguXHDCFJEB0-O6DfJfD1hQ1Oe5OMXF_DaywAKPKwtnMvz51xjQZmW2wrdB1B732I-PEzvVgutnMmaGbZJCDB52fC_ieoliHWRWf7d4O6_Fvt4GIzst8eFmDeQ1u-JkYDYo4lvTKMwiufkK/w640-h360/alberta%20(9).jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8UZnBu91mEgexuSAhCqvsjLmWpe65uU6YjFnsASSVYJfzcU3kQcL_VpaNZWg0xujfYy2SiSw_TgGt7BwgFaeFPvb_7oDXAP0mhejiSsqAnB1AjEtO4RKKVpXRRfn-3iqENJ2i99HSXjOsHSiqvGJA7Cv9_EulaaudB80Nnws1WY_q-_lPZ2iyh4Sp/s2240/blog-banners-%20(1).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1260" data-original-width="2240" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8UZnBu91mEgexuSAhCqvsjLmWpe65uU6YjFnsASSVYJfzcU3kQcL_VpaNZWg0xujfYy2SiSw_TgGt7BwgFaeFPvb_7oDXAP0mhejiSsqAnB1AjEtO4RKKVpXRRfn-3iqENJ2i99HSXjOsHSiqvGJA7Cv9_EulaaudB80Nnws1WY_q-_lPZ2iyh4Sp/w640-h360/blog-banners-%20(1).jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br /><div><br /></div><div>I had a fantastic time in Alberta and hope to be back soon. I checked it off the bucket list but it's somewhere I could see myself visiting again and again. I felt very grounded and calm while adventuring, and that doesn't happen to me often. There is something to be said about the beauty and stillness you feel when you're up on top of a mountain and looking down and around at your surroundings. It is a good feeling and slightly addicting. </div><div><br /></div><div>Drop me a comment if you have been or are going to Alberta :) Enjoy the adventure! </div><div class="blogger-post-footer">All Opinions Are My Own!</div>Kayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3957465572861863837.post-2301112585477698922022-08-12T21:42:00.005-04:002022-11-23T18:10:16.235-05:00Dear Diary: Chemo cycle 1<div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9m9o03W7Gv574oO9gSef9NOxzsZ3VZlTFDYAi0n7dyv-LGu15-N1ZfKB6NjXtVVaTgvv3vSjC-iiMUCsKCfhLOLMB5kdiUkI4VIMu-yFW-MiyUYF0nwewX2dGLLRwHcaJyro9Oxfd3lSEhzgijzW-oGxXjH5RyPCI_WIGXpAyZL_lccghlhMSmU-y/s2240/christmas.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1260" data-original-width="2240" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9m9o03W7Gv574oO9gSef9NOxzsZ3VZlTFDYAi0n7dyv-LGu15-N1ZfKB6NjXtVVaTgvv3vSjC-iiMUCsKCfhLOLMB5kdiUkI4VIMu-yFW-MiyUYF0nwewX2dGLLRwHcaJyro9Oxfd3lSEhzgijzW-oGxXjH5RyPCI_WIGXpAyZL_lccghlhMSmU-y/w640-h360/christmas.png" width="640" /></a></div><strong><br /></strong></div><strong><div><strong><br /></strong></div><div><strong>December 9, 2014</strong></div></strong>Today was my first ABVD chemo session in the first cycle. I almost passed out when they put the needle into my hand. I'm not sure why though because I've never been paranoid about them before. I managed to choke down some ginger ale and rice crackers which helped me bounce back. Chemo took about 3 hours in total and went generally smooth (minus my fucking IV). <div><br /></div><div>After chemo, I was feeling well. Well enough to indulge in a Starbucks coffee. The boyfriend and I grabbed our complicated orders and planted ourselves on my couch for the next few hours. Again, because I was feeling good, I decided to eat a bowl of chicken chilli...big mistake. </div><div><br /></div><div>An hour after, the side effects started to kick in. Nausea and extreme tiredness were my best friends for the entire day. The next few days that followed, consisted of me hanging around my house, not eating much and just relaxing and sleeping. I overall felt weak and tired but was still about to do some small household things. By Friday I was feeling relatively back to normal. The weekend...terrible. I was in so much agony I cried for 2 days and didn't sleep. At long last, I got some medicine and was feeling like my old self for the rest of the second week.<div><br /></div><div><br /><strong>December</strong><strong> 23, 2014</strong><br />The second chemo session today went much better. Took 2 hours with 0 pain thanks to my amazing Picc line..not. After chemo, I was feeling tired, but I managed to stay up until 10:30 before trying to sleep. It was a restless sleep, I flip-flopped all over the bed - my dog was bouncing everywhere. I'm glad this today seems to be going better than yesterday because tomorrow is when I celebrate Christmas and I really want to be able to go! On the plus side, I'm done with 1 out of 6 chemotherapy cycles. 5 more to go before treatment is over!<br /><br />HAPPY CHRISTMAS TO EVERYONE!!!</div></div><div class="blogger-post-footer">All Opinions Are My Own!</div>Kayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3957465572861863837.post-46889949857399475152022-08-10T15:47:00.008-04:002023-05-15T09:42:53.618-04:00The truth about infertility in your 20's.<p>Last year, I decided to get my fertility checked. I wanted to know my options. I've known for years that the chances were low and maybe impossible. Unfortunately for me, my transplant caused my infertility. I didn't preserve my eggs when I had the opportunity. So when I had my test done, and the doctor told me that I could not have my own biological children, I was not surprised but still sad. </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhNIYTsFYD7Zw1C9OhvI-iQTfuiXN_oFhLXi3Fun2Ww-d--hgbaRkl6WEpY1hlmfBzmgQ3b11s6M4N9Gp9W2PYZDxrkzJKXUSoncdXOM6TiEbE7tqIqFM3MzVpx0qZhg61R5p0cacDHkAeILPIuv0VWpEG7wF92T0srWsMJ2Vg_bOh-yBEydyVQ1Ke4/s2240/in-the-sun.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1260" data-original-width="2240" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhNIYTsFYD7Zw1C9OhvI-iQTfuiXN_oFhLXi3Fun2Ww-d--hgbaRkl6WEpY1hlmfBzmgQ3b11s6M4N9Gp9W2PYZDxrkzJKXUSoncdXOM6TiEbE7tqIqFM3MzVpx0qZhg61R5p0cacDHkAeILPIuv0VWpEG7wF92T0srWsMJ2Vg_bOh-yBEydyVQ1Ke4/w640-h360/in-the-sun.png" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><p><i>A female is born with all the eggs she will have. As she moves through puberty, hormones allow mature eggs to be released every month during the menstrual cycle until the female reaches menopause and the hormonal cycles eventually stop. Chemotherapy (chemo) works by killing cells in the body that are dividing quickly. The hormones, such as estrogen, needed to release eggs each month and prepare the uterus for a possible pregnancy are made in the cells of the ovaries (oocytes). Oocytes tend to divide quickly, so are often affected by chemo. This can lead to the loss of those important hormones and can affect fertility. Sometimes a woman will go into premature or early menopause – Cancer.org</i></p><p>When I was first diagnosed with cancer at the age of 21, getting my eggs frozen and preserving my fertility was the LAST thing on my mind. I was in survival mode. I was not interested in being pumped full of hormones and going through another painful procedure to have my eggs removed and frozen. All I could focus on was not dying.</p><p>There are so many chemotherapy drugs that cause infertility, and it just so happens I was given many of them: Cisplatin, Doxorubicin, Vinblastine and Cyclophosphamide.</p><p>During that first year of cancer treatment, I still got my period every month, so I was like, "Okay, I am good." And maybe I was. But when I relapsed at 22 and found myself in another year of treatment that would be more difficult, I still decided not to go through with any fertility preservation. To be honest, I actually have no memory of even discussing it with my team of specialists, but my mom says that they did ask me and when I said no they moved on to other topics, aka signing my life away if I died.</p><p>After my transplant, my period stopped, and I went into premature menopause. I went through all the regular hot flashes, weight gain, hormones out of control (or lack of hormones) and my thyroid also stopped working. Fast forward to now; medication and time have given me some stability. Now the realities of infertility are hitting me.</p><p>When I was younger, being a mom was not something I considered. I had a lot of dreams and aspirations that were more important to me. I've lived many of those dreams and they have been great. I have more dreams but now that I am getting closer to being in my 30s, I am thinking more about how I might want my future to look.</p><p>I still do not know if I want to have my own biological kids, but I do want to have the option open. During my appointment with the fertility doctor, he told me I was less than 0.1% fertile. He then began to tell me about the other options I had available to me. Just because I can not create my own biological baby does not mean I can't carry a baby to term. My body is able to carry and provide for a baby, I would just need to find a donor egg and sperm (depending on if I was with a partner). I could also adopt or connect with a surrogate. If I found a partner with their own kids already, that could be just or more fulfilling. So I have a lot of avenues to explore if the time comes. </p><p>I am not in any place to have a kid right now. I know this. What I think about is whether I'd be financially able to try. IVF and donor egg/sperm are very expensive. We are talking in the $20k USD range. That's a huge amount of money. How would I ever be able to afford that AND save for retirement AND maybe buy a house one day? Is it even possible to have all these things? </p><p>So this is where I am right now. What is important to me? Do I want a house to build my life in and use as my financial nest egg for the future? Do I want to save for a comfortable retirement? Do I want a baby in the next 10 years? I have no fucking idea. I do not even know what I want to eat for dinner tonight. </p><p>I know I want a house. I know this. I know I want to have money for retirement, and I know that a home could provide that financial stability and equity for retirement. I know I want to continue to reach my goals. I am 29 years old and I have to think about my future so much more than someone who has not had cancer because I do not have the luxury of having the same advantages as they do. And that fucking sucks. I hate it. I hate that I had to make that choice at 21 years old, on whether I wanted kids or not. Like HELLO, I was just told I had stage 3 cancer, I couldn't take another blow and be asked to make a decision. And to be honest, if I could go back and redo it, I do not know if I would make the same choice or not.</p><p>I do not know if I want to have a biological baby. If I met someone with kids, I would be so happy and love them as my own. I know I could be a good mom if I had the chance. I also know that even being a stepmom, I would want the option of discussing having another child. I do not need a yes/no I just need it to be an open conversation and possibility. I think about going through IVF and not having it work. How horrible would that be both emotionally and financially? But is it worth not trying?</p><p>I cannot help but wishfully dream of raising my own baby. Teaching them about Estonia and their heritage. Decorating the house for Halloween, Christmas, and Easter. Watching them learn to swim and be as good as I am. Helping them with homework...or hiring a tutor because my math skills are shit. Art fairs, science projects and reading books together. Showing them the rich cultures of the world and watching their eyes light up with curiosity. I know in my heart I would love to have these experiences if I could. I know I could do it alone, I could be a single mom. That does not bother or scare me and maybe that is the path I will take someday. </p><p>I also think about my freedom a lot. I have a lot of freedom as someone without kids, and I would continue to have that into my adulthood. I can do whatever I want, whenever I want. I do not have to provide for another person (well, except my sister who lives with me). I love my life and the freedom I have to be selfish. Am I willing to give that all up? I am not sure. </p><p>I won't ever be sure until I am at the point where I have to make a decision. I am leaving all the doors open. Whatever happens, will happen. I have options even though I cannot do anything to change the course of my infertility.</p><div class="blogger-post-footer">All Opinions Are My Own!</div>Kayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3957465572861863837.post-82846712769405080292022-08-07T13:40:00.006-04:002022-11-23T18:13:21.907-05:00Feeling your feelings.<p>It's so hard to let myself feel my feelings. Detaching and avoiding emotions is easy. It's less painful in the moment. It's also cowardly. I didn't allow myself to feel anything for years. I did not know how to feel anything except hate. I isolated myself from being happy because I thought I did not deserve it. I still think, in my dark moments, that I deserve to be unhappy. It comes from my insecurity that I am never enough for myself and for others. This insecurity was born when I got cancer. It grew. I kept feeding it.</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwzAPYRPlbtClD_iVqt0uGJHiF0KFZdD5ChiW9fXKaiSZSFKdwZyImEBB1NJWCqJrg7GXCpvR2S_sMf9Bxcb3aZIVT_3jBK0J3VefTFYbVpbOKb1VKLZetFuREdmOBu8XQh9c1ldlVKi0s-ONI5Kbcb6p4HIZT91DePGQTNFPekEPlvHaYCzli0Ruh/s2240/feeling-my-feelings.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1260" data-original-width="2240" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwzAPYRPlbtClD_iVqt0uGJHiF0KFZdD5ChiW9fXKaiSZSFKdwZyImEBB1NJWCqJrg7GXCpvR2S_sMf9Bxcb3aZIVT_3jBK0J3VefTFYbVpbOKb1VKLZetFuREdmOBu8XQh9c1ldlVKi0s-ONI5Kbcb6p4HIZT91DePGQTNFPekEPlvHaYCzli0Ruh/w640-h360/feeling-my-feelings.png" width="640" /></a></div><p>Someone recently said to me, "It's sad that you came so close to dying with your cancer, only to throw your life away and still have no self-respect or dignity. You should get a new therapist because clearly you are not any better and will end up alone." </p><p>That comment (from people who are no longer part of my life) has been on my mind for the last week. Not because I believed it, but because somebody didn't like how I was taking charge by standing up for myself and speaking/living my truth. I was at the point where I was doing what I needed to create safety and set boundaries. These people decided they didn't like it. They wanted me to know that I was worthless. Because I didn't pick them, I picked myself. </p><p>It's funny when you finally stand up to someone and stop letting them walk all over you and how their narrative about you changes.</p><p>Even though I do not believe those words about myself, when I am in a vulnerable state, the cruelty from them comes back to mind fuck me. I know I am strong. I know I am kind. The problem right now is that I am not strong, I am very sad and confused.</p><p>I am trying to take back control – bring the power back to myself – by acknowledging these emotional responses I'm having and working through them instead of burying them. Like I previously did.</p><p>Living by the phrase, "it's okay to not be okay" is hard. Dealing with trauma, guilt, loneliness, and heartbreak are some of the worst feelings in the world. </p><p>When I was diagnosed with blood cancer I don't think I ever shed a single tear for myself. During my years of treatment, the only times I can remember crying is when I had a fever and infection. My mom and I drove downtown at 3am to the hospital. I was admitted to urgent care and I BEGGED her to stay with me. </p><p>MY POINT IS, I think the fact that I'm able to cry means I'm allowing myself to really <b>feel a lot of stuff I tried not to</b>. Feeling means I am human. Feeling means I'm alive. </p><p>I am inexplicably sad. There's probably a little sprinkle of survivor's guilt mixed into all that. I'm giving my feelings space. I know that time does help heal. Healing comes from within. The little things in life help. I am trying to focus on them. And I will be okay :)</p><div class="blogger-post-footer">All Opinions Are My Own!</div>Kayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3957465572861863837.post-24135273523886371642022-07-28T09:54:00.007-04:002022-11-23T18:26:50.559-05:00I am surviving, not thriving<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFHfxtYy0Yw-BAzuoGUZxFS4yIKToNpwuA5QK2REgcI4DqVHfazxPYO3COZ8Y7aeLJbJV5kK-tSeMdjOjvfmbws1Z5oze5_B8aF4Lpk3L2rnRgfKlb7Y6djkLbi0ye8g2VAvybQadgqEsIVpN4wYY_n6L2pMg0yfMbMflBkNE9hAAGsihIUO5R8KdZ/s2240/surviving-not-thriving.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1260" data-original-width="2240" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFHfxtYy0Yw-BAzuoGUZxFS4yIKToNpwuA5QK2REgcI4DqVHfazxPYO3COZ8Y7aeLJbJV5kK-tSeMdjOjvfmbws1Z5oze5_B8aF4Lpk3L2rnRgfKlb7Y6djkLbi0ye8g2VAvybQadgqEsIVpN4wYY_n6L2pMg0yfMbMflBkNE9hAAGsihIUO5R8KdZ/w640-h360/surviving-not-thriving.png" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div></div>It's July 28, 2022. It's 6 years in remission. It's 6 years spent slowly healing to whatever my new 'normal' is. And today I realized that I am not thriving right now, I am surviving. But that is okay.<div><br /></div><div>You cannot be thriving and your best self all the time, it's unrealistic. I have been working on connecting, listening and healing my inner child in the last while and here are some things I have realized that are contributing to my current survival state vs my previous thriving state.</div><div><br /></div><div>It's hard to admit something you don't like about yourself. It's hard to sit down and be honest about your flaws and how they hurt you more than help you. I was diagnosed with cancer when I was 21. Legally I was an adult but in reality, I was still a child, naive to the world and living with rose-coloured glasses on. I started my cancer journey with the intention of not letting myself feel any emotions so that I could actually survive the disease and live. There is no bravery in that. You live or you die, it's a choice. </div><div><br /></div><div>During my years of treatment, I was shown a world of incredible medicine and human resiliency. I was also shown pain, sorrow, emptiness, and death. Even though my family was very supportive, I was alone. A little piece of me died every day for the better part of 5 years. I began to stress about being alone forever. I did not have the mental space to feel and deal with my shit so instead, I became hard and mean and unwilling.</div><div><br /></div><div><i>These anxious and avoidant attachment styles developed to protect you in childhood. Your mind recognized that in the situation or environment you were in, being open and vulnerable was dangerous. So you developed protective measures to take care of yourself when others would not. </i></div><div><br /></div><div>As time passed, I slowly began to feel better with therapy, social connections to other YA cancer individuals, medication and reconnecting with things that made me happy (work, reading, fitness, food, etc). I realize I never actually took the time to heal that 21-year-old who withered away as a result of my cancer. I became increasingly anxious about life, and that the people in my life would leave me, or not like me, the thoughts would consume me and I would sink into depression episodes lasting days or weeks or even months. The anxious attachment says, "you are not giving me enough" when really the people in your life are trying to give as much as they can, but you cannot always see it. </div><div><br /></div><div>I am surviving, not thriving because I am understanding that I need to do some work on healing my anxiety. Writing helps, going for walks, and doing things alone create comfort in not having to share everything with others. Finding comfort in taking space for emotional needs, and not feeling like everyone will leave you because of it. Part of me says to not let my guard down again, to not be vulnerable.</div><div><br /></div><div>I know who I am. I know I am kind and caring and I love too hard. I know I am compassionate and headstrong and stubborn, but also full of life. I want simple moments, not grand gestures. I know I would give the world and rearrange my entire life for someone (friend, family, partner, etc). I also know that's not a good idea lol. I know I am full of life. It's easy to forget these things when your depression is smothering you into thinking you are worthless.</div><div><br /></div><div>So yeah, right now I am not thriving. I am learning and surviving. I cry a lot, and eating is difficult. I go to work and do the best damn job I can do. The rest is a work in progress. I am a work in progress. I am surviving. And that is okay.</div><div><br /></div><div class="blogger-post-footer">All Opinions Are My Own!</div>Kayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3957465572861863837.post-53957462544630268922022-07-26T13:44:00.004-04:002022-08-07T13:41:11.137-04:00Goodbye for now, not forever.Hey everyone, it's been a while. It's funny, I have written a few blog posts in the last 6 months but never posted them, they always seemed unfinished. My life is a big old question mark right now and navigating it has been difficult and confusing.<div><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLL6ePPgclLTjj0dISAbH2qxWUpIvyiBFGYN2Kcn2Sht6CDLQ1DR8GyIbADgm0jDYeZF3BV_niKbTmuWRH72w2E3uo6Y9wq8gdfu-mAQn8lrn815g2660yERcsK7ikuWdeUQU0NKp-LPwOaVkhn3vXzHc5WzzC94wU8qGnfrEbVhjYu0qna9R7cTI6/s1897/SimpleRitual3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1266" data-original-width="1897" height="429" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLL6ePPgclLTjj0dISAbH2qxWUpIvyiBFGYN2Kcn2Sht6CDLQ1DR8GyIbADgm0jDYeZF3BV_niKbTmuWRH72w2E3uo6Y9wq8gdfu-mAQn8lrn815g2660yERcsK7ikuWdeUQU0NKp-LPwOaVkhn3vXzHc5WzzC94wU8qGnfrEbVhjYu0qna9R7cTI6/w640-h429/SimpleRitual3.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br /><div>As many of you know, I started my own business in 2020. It's been an amazing part of my life until now. Now it's becoming a burden. If I am being real with you guys, financially the business is not working or making enough money. I had to move out of my storage unit and pack away everything under the stairs in the apartment I live in. Due to my living arrangements, continuing the business in my home is not feasible anymore. I do not have enough room to keep things clean and organized and separated from my day-to-day living. It would become a nightmare. I need separation in life for certain things, and running a business was one of them.<br /><br />I am at a breaking point where I can no longer joyously run a business and balance my personal life. I do not love running the business anymore. Although we are closing shop, you can continue to shop the available candles on our website + in-store with The Makers Hub of Canada until the end of 2022. <div><br /></div><div>I do not want this goodbye to be forever, but I do not know what the future holds, all I can do is focus on things one day at a time, but something needs to give, and unfortunately this is it. As I said, this is not forever, and I hope to reopen doors one day soon and continue to create candles for your grounding practices. </div><div><br /></div><div>For now, I need to remember what I always tell you guys, and I need to put my own needs first and take a step back to understand how to take a step forward. I love you all, thank you for the years of support and kindness you have shown me and Simple Ritual. All your photos, emails, messages, story sharing and reviews have made me so happy and pushed me to keep going through a lot of hard times.</div><div><br /></div><div>There are other things in my life I want to get back to like writing, blogging, and making fun videos on YouTube. I miss that. There are a lot of things you can do for free but generally speaking, you need some money to be able to live and right now I am not living because ALL my extra money is going into paying for business needs. I cannot move forward with my life the way this is going. This is such a hard choice to make but for my mental health, I need to make it. <br /><br /></div></div><div>This is not really a goodbye, it's more of a see you later. Thank you for everything <3.</div><div class="blogger-post-footer">All Opinions Are My Own!</div>Kayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3957465572861863837.post-89140869399530524712022-01-08T21:27:00.005-05:002022-07-26T13:44:21.338-04:00Welcome 2022<div class="separator"><span style="text-align: center;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiOv4fSs8knFVM4Pi4ZbnC9wTQC_2yq1JGpk8ixAbo0Og2_ERY1W4qzg9GicuY40lTtsEtEqAwxj3CHwnqTEU5jba9V7GaoScX1Z3gwyQdSC0YmmxoIUa3ofMOjwjflIVp23phoqTHpUGPr0rscFt1ugRAFd5QEhENTnoc4q8rWY2eBFi5L8j1516F0=s2128" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2128" data-original-width="1596" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiOv4fSs8knFVM4Pi4ZbnC9wTQC_2yq1JGpk8ixAbo0Og2_ERY1W4qzg9GicuY40lTtsEtEqAwxj3CHwnqTEU5jba9V7GaoScX1Z3gwyQdSC0YmmxoIUa3ofMOjwjflIVp23phoqTHpUGPr0rscFt1ugRAFd5QEhENTnoc4q8rWY2eBFi5L8j1516F0=w480-h640" width="480" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Hi friends, it's me! In case you forgot, hey, I'm Kayla; a 20-something cancer survivor living her life after cancer. It has been a hot minute since I posted on my blog, but I am back with some new years goals and mindset shifts for myself and my life.</div></span></div><br />2021 was kind of wild: covid-19, quarantine, lockdown...it was tough. I learned a lot of lessons in 2021 throughout the pandemic that I want to take into 2022 for myself and to focus on the things that serve me and encourage me. 2022 may still be uncertain for a lot of us in the world, but I am putting energy into the things I can control in my life so that I can stay present and grounded for myself.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><b>Ask once, and if not received then let go.<br /></b><br />Something I tend to stress about it if making plans or planning activities. I am very social and outgoing and I love to connect with the people in my life as much as I can. I get a lot of energy from people and I want to know what's going on in their lives. I love sitting with friends or my partner or family and catching up, sharing tea, and having laughs in any setting. I am a planner, and this can give me a lot of anxiety when the people who I am trying to plan with do not seem to reciprocate the same excitement that I do - that is a me problem, and I know I get down in the dumps when plans change or fall through. It affects me more than I like to admit and I often feel let down and unwanted. This is not me blaming people for changing or missing plans, this is me voicing that I am directly affected by those actions.<br /><br />Something I have decided to implement this year, to protect my feelings, is to ask once and if not received to let go. I will always want to plan events or activities or hangouts with people, it is just who I am. My goal is to not stress about re-planning or following up with people. I will ask and plan something and if it falls through I will leave it up to others to rectify. I need to learn to leave the ball in other people's courts and not get anxious or hurt over trying to rectify an activity. The way I see it is if someone wants to see me or spend time with me, they will make an effort to find a new time of day that works for them...or at least this is what I hope.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><b>Tell people how I feel in the moment.<br /></b><br />All my life I have not told people how I felt <u>in the moment</u>. I let negative feelings fester and grow inside me until I either explode on someone or I use it as ammunition in a later confrontation. I do not want to be that person anymore. If I get butt-hurt in a conversation with someone, I want to tell them at the moment. Sometimes words are misused or communicated poorly. If we don't bring attention to it at that moment, and instead bring it up later, it could become a larger issue, or the person in question may not even remember what they were trying to tell you! So, if I do not like something that is said to me, I will call it out and not hold onto it for weeks on weeks. Bad mojo.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><b>Stop making excuses for other people & myself.<br /></b><br />I am SO guilty for this. I make excuses for people in my life because I am always trying to see the best in them and give them the benefit of the doubt, but honestly, we are all adults and we are all flawed (me too!) and it's not okay to keep covering for fucks ups. Call yourself out if you fuck up, don't cover it up or twist it into an excuse. Be honest with yourself on your flaws and work on them. And do not make excuses for people who are messing up. Call them out too. Yes be respectful and have a conversation but don't just laugh it off.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><b>My feelings are valid.<br /></b><br />My feelings are valid. I do not need to alter my feelings to meet other people's needs. I am allowed to go through my emotions and process them. I am allowed to speak my truth. I will surround myself with people who respect my feelings and who respect me. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><b>I am worthy of love.<br /></b><br />Pretty self-explanatory. I deserve to be happy and to be loved and I will not allow myself to think that I do not deserve that happiness anymore. I deserve to be loved by others and myself and deserve to be treated with respect. I am not perfect, I am very flawed and still damaged, but I deserve happiness as much as we all do. I need to remind myself every day that I deserve that and I am worthy of love and abundance.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><b>Don't be a nag.<br /></b><br />I AM SO GUILTY FOR THIS and I want to be better. I know I nag people and it's because I see so much potential in them. I need to remember that people need to figure shit out for themselves and take their paths in life. Even if I think they are too slow or making a mistake, I need to learn to step back and not take their choices as personal stress. I need to CHILL and let people be people and not try to control things in the way that I think is right. My right way is not everyone else's the right way.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><b>Develop a routine.<br /></b><br />I have discovered that I am the most productive version of myself when I stick to a routine. There are a lot of moving parts in my life and it is really hard to balance them all and give time to them all equally. A lot of people have told me I have too much going on and I should slow down. I need to learn to take things off my plate and create a holistic schedule for myself that is sustainable. I want to balance my life and time with my partner, family friends as well as work and personal life, which requires a schedule that is organized but not rigid. Be open to change and movement and have moments of spontaneity. <br /><br /><br /><br />That is all, for now, friends, thanks for listening as always, and happy new year. I hope it is filled with laughter and love and happiness.<div class="blogger-post-footer">All Opinions Are My Own!</div>Kayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3957465572861863837.post-64075575020771833742021-02-09T13:32:00.008-05:002023-10-17T11:15:56.018-04:00Swedish Apple Pie<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPpfAXH6rK3EqwvJs7vROsKiUbHrdZjZTijIGYH9CgqqYyKzC4UknctEw8PeT9NKZWdG_nFDmlkAcasmZgcpSx7VSVD3t06ElFbV9wFoG8uV0fz7l_6KmrBRZanBahrD8a0h47Y4YxfWw634aa9JIHosGe-uKQbYYGWie9seqgjMS23CJ7HEjunUXP/s2240/blog-banners-%20(2).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1260" data-original-width="2240" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPpfAXH6rK3EqwvJs7vROsKiUbHrdZjZTijIGYH9CgqqYyKzC4UknctEw8PeT9NKZWdG_nFDmlkAcasmZgcpSx7VSVD3t06ElFbV9wFoG8uV0fz7l_6KmrBRZanBahrD8a0h47Y4YxfWw634aa9JIHosGe-uKQbYYGWie9seqgjMS23CJ7HEjunUXP/w640-h360/blog-banners-%20(2).jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><p>My grandmother died last summer. Due to the COVID-19 restrictions, I was not able to see her for 5 months while she was still alive. I miss her and my grandfather very much and I’ve been thinking of them a lot lately and how much of an impact they had on my life. Something that we did a lot together was bake. I remember as a kid I was making all these ‘potions’ in their kitchen and just pretending to be this fabulous baker/witch who could craft up anything. We actually did bake real food though, and I can distinctly remember the scent of apples and cinnamon floating through their condo.</p><p>I decided to bake a Swedish apple pie to make me feel closer to them. The warm apples and cinnamon fragrance drifted through the house all day and I know my grandparents would have loved that and would have loved to eat it with me.</p><p>This is a gluten-free and dairy-free Swedish pie recipe. If you want to make it completely vegan, you can swap out the egg for a flax egg! Apple pie is one of those desserts that really brings cozy comfort to the end of a meal together. Serve it with vanilla ice cream, whipped cream, or my personal favourite, with a cup of tea and the pie in its simplicity.</p><br /><p><b>Swedish Apple Pie</b></p><p>Ingredients:</p><p></p><ul style="text-align: left;"><li>6 apples, peeled</li><li>1 TBSP cinnamon</li><li>1 TBSP coconut sugar</li><li>1 egg (or try a flax egg for a vegan pie)</li><li>1/2 cup white sugar</li><li>1 cup of gluten-free flour (1-1 baking ratio is best) or regular flour for non-gluten-free peeps</li><li>1/2-1 cup of nut milk (or regular)</li><li>Butter (vegan or regular)</li></ul><p></p><p><br /></p><p>Heat your oven to 350<span face="arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #202124; font-size: 14px;">°</span> F.</p><p>First, you’ll want to peel and slice 6 apples into a bowl. I used the apples in my fridge so use whatever you have on hand. Add the coconut sugar and cinnamon to the apples and mix until the apples are coated. Set aside.</p><p>Using the vegan butter and a paper towel, butter your pie dish. You could use coconut oil or regular butter as well, whatever you like as long as the dish is coated! Take your apple mixture and pour it into the pie dish making sure the apples are evenly spread out.</p><p>In another bowl, melt about 3 TBSP of butter in the microwave. Once melted, add in the egg, your 1/2 cup of sugar, and flour and mix. At this point, it may look dry so add in a few slashes of nut milk to thin out the mixture. You want to end up with a custard/cakey-looking batter that can be spread but is not runny or watery.</p><p>Once you receive a good consistency, pour the batter mixture over the top of your apples. Use a spatula to spread it as best you can so that the apples are covered. I added a sprinkle of sugar on the top to help it caramelize. </p><p>Bake at 350 for 50 minutes or until the top is golden and crispy. Let it cool for a few minutes before serving. Enjoy!</p><div class="blogger-post-footer">All Opinions Are My Own!</div>Kayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3957465572861863837.post-29233718209223016212020-11-06T16:05:00.004-05:002022-11-23T18:32:36.902-05:00Learning To Love Again After Cancer<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-4EENcOtf-qU/X6Q5TnfOgkI/AAAAAAABmpo/W8sbnVi87QQNrhVALEAt3WQMe1Yz2ksTQCPcBGAsYHg/s3203/00100dPORTRAIT_00100_BURST20201024160601875_COVER.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3203" data-original-width="2402" height="640" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-4EENcOtf-qU/X6Q5TnfOgkI/AAAAAAABmpo/W8sbnVi87QQNrhVALEAt3WQMe1Yz2ksTQCPcBGAsYHg/w480-h640/00100dPORTRAIT_00100_BURST20201024160601875_COVER.jpg" width="480" /></a></div><p>I can't believe it's already November!!!!! Where has the time gone, I am weeping. I hope you are all doing well and being safe in this tricky time...I know I am. I moved to work from home and if I see a friend we usually just go for a walk outside and have tea/coffee together. </p><p>So it's now been 4.5 years since I was deemed 'no sign of disease' by my oncology team. My life has changed so much and I do feel like I have grown as a person a lot. Something I have been thinking about lately is love, the concept of love, how to love and how to receive love. Emotions have been a topic that I always struggle with internally. It's like, intellectually I can express in words how I am feeling, but I often have trouble with the actual feeling part - and love is especially one of those emotions I do not understand. </p><p>I have friends and family who I see in partnerships and you can feel the love emanating from them; the way they look at each other, the subtle touches, the laughter and the comfort. I do not think I have ever felt these things, even in my last long-term relationship...which was somewhat toxic now that I reflect on it. It's no surprise that cancer changes us as people both mentally and physically but I seem to have stumbled into this world of cancer changing my ability to love or develop compassion for another human. Don't get me wrong, I love my family and my close friends, and I would legit die for them and do anything I could to help them. This love I am talking about is for a significant other, someone with who I want to share life but feel so guarded all the time, like I have massive steel walls built around my heart and my soul, making it seem unattainable. </p><p>I know that cancer affects relationships, it did in mine as I was going through treatment and in the years after. But what I do not know is how I built these walls that have stopped me from truly opening up and being vulnerable and allowing myself to love someone else...or be loved by someone else.</p><p>I look back at some old photos and I feel sooooo detached from that girl, which is normal, but I am also envious because I think my heart was way more open than it is now. I do not know how to navigate love in this post-cancer life. During treatment, I lost SO much of myself physically and mentally, my hair, eyelashes, my libido, my confidence, my body. A lot of insecurities can come with this, including a new form of self-preservation and fierce protectiveness over yourself. In time, I was able to gain many of the things I lost back – they were changed, but they returned.</p><p>During recovery from cancer, we are encouraged to learn and discover what we want our life to be about, but also that it's time to focus on ourselves and learn to love ourselves again. If I cannot love myself, how can I love another person? Makes sense really, we have to be our own heroes, our own success and learn to stand on our own two feet again. No one is going to come to save us but ourselves.</p><p>I think that learning to love and even date again after cancer is most difficult because even though for the most part I am 'okay' I see life very differently from most people which in turn can make it really difficult to connect with someone emotionally. I value my own time way more, I value life like it's a thirst I can't seem to quench and I value myself more than anyone else. Maybe that's it, I value myself 100% more than anyone else. I will do whatever it takes to make sure I am living life how I want it, which can leave little room for the ability to love another person (again, not applying this to friendships, but to potential partnerships with a significant other).</p><p>I understand that life is so precious and short. I know what it's like to be a healthy 21-year-old one day, and then be told that I have tumours all over my chest the next day. I know what it's like to spend hours attached to an IV drip of chemotherapy. I know it's like holding your breath while a radiation laser zig zags over your body. I know what it's like to hurt. I know what it's like to die and be alive again.</p><p>I do not want to settle into something that I do not understand or want. So even though I have been dating, no one has actually shown that they cared enough to get to know the real me. And to be honest, if I were to die tomorrow or get sick again *knock on wood* would I want to be with someone on such a superficial level? Hard Pass. I want the person I am with to make me feel alive and I want to make them feel alive. I want to feel magic and curiosity and the unknown. I want to learn from them, and them from me. Sounds like a fairytale but LOL I am good with that analogy. Honestly, life is too short to settle, that is something cancer can gift us all with. It's important to be happy, something a cancer patient knows well.</p><p>What cancer survivors have over everyone else in the world is that we understand undoubtedly how short life is, and how important it is to be happy. Maybe for me, my happiness and love come hand in hand. I am happy with my life right now, my business, and myself, and therefore maybe I am not serious about receiving love from someone else as I am filled with enough love for myself at my current stage of life. I like the sounds of that, to be honest. </p><p>I am enjoying life, I am living, I am laughing and I am not really ready to be with anyone who isn't on that level, that sounds so obnoxious but hey it's the truth! I do want to find a partner to share my life with but I can't rush a plan that the universe has for me and I will not be settling for a tinfoil knight, fuck that I want a fire-breathing knight in steel armour who can fight and live life alongside me; for now, I am my own fire breathing knight because life is too short for a tinfoil love.</p><div class="blogger-post-footer">All Opinions Are My Own!</div>Kayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.com4Toronto, ON, Canada43.653226 -79.383184315.342992163821151 -114.5394343 71.963459836178842 -44.226934299999996tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3957465572861863837.post-81251529787843310942020-08-30T19:15:00.010-04:002022-11-23T18:33:04.055-05:00Starting my own small business!<div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglL3es-yvH5mftB2XVo29aa-3uuXf4-_qyMUjA2FrtKa3mNeOaEw_sHk3gUEzSE6zW0l1ltyF9DnLudF0dKe0TzbXn983NzpTqdXXoa7PVXWHynSBiSVbLVmLuQl3K7ToHdO2FeSMojzZKluVvu-nnY_tgo_LR0YK372tN2M7Sv35smhdBiuMXyHEi/s2240/blog-banners-.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1260" data-original-width="2240" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglL3es-yvH5mftB2XVo29aa-3uuXf4-_qyMUjA2FrtKa3mNeOaEw_sHk3gUEzSE6zW0l1ltyF9DnLudF0dKe0TzbXn983NzpTqdXXoa7PVXWHynSBiSVbLVmLuQl3K7ToHdO2FeSMojzZKluVvu-nnY_tgo_LR0YK372tN2M7Sv35smhdBiuMXyHEi/w640-h360/blog-banners-.png" width="640" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div>It's kind of funny when I tell people I decided to start my own business one night while brushing my teeth. <br /><br />As a cancer survivor and thriver, it's been a priority to have products in my life that are not only clean for the environment but also for my body's health. After going through hard treatments that left me feeling weak, compromised and vulnerable, I started to question and look at the things on my own and wonder how safe they were. One of the first things I looked into was candles. After researching and discovering all the potentially harmful chemicals in the commercialized candle industry, I found that the only way I could know what was in my candles was if I made the candles myself. <br /><br />I wanted to create a clean-burning candle company that was safe for both people and the environment. That night, instead of sleeping, I worked on a business plan and wrote out pages and pages of objectives, goals, the brand concept, and my mission.<br /><br />After considerable research, material sourcing, and 30 anxiety attacks, I placed my first order for sample materials and began brewing up batches of soy candles. I tested different scents, and different soy waxes (yes, there are different kinds of soy wax) and I worked on finding the best vessels for the candles. It was important that my business was sustainable and did not contribute to mass consumerism. I am a lover of second-hand treasures, thrifting and vintage; I wanted to share my love of it with my community. The goal was to create candles that not only were good for your health, but that spoke to the power of sustainability and minimizing "throw-away" culture. I do believe there is a candle for everybody and that is what I strive for when I source my vintage glass. Each candle is unique and one-of-a-kind. And so, Simple Ritual was born!<br /><br />The company mantra started with the idea of a ritual. By definition, a ritual is a series of thoughtful actions, practiced regularly, to draw us into a sacred space. Rituals invite us to use intention; focus our senses, movements, and feelings, to create meaning and purpose. Our lives are chaotic and often interrupted, yet we should still make time for our rituals throughout the day. For some, it may be that first cup of coffee enjoyed in peaceful solitude. For others, it could be a carved-out moment in the day to read a good book or write in a journal. Simple Ritual was born out of a desire to define these moments. By lighting one of our candles, you are taking a moment to ground yourself, to be present, honour and recognize your emotions and feelings, and practice your daily simple ritual.<br /><br />Simple Ritual candles are made in small batches using biodegradable soy wax with vintage vessels and metal canisters sourced in the Toronto GTA. Handpoured glass, natural soy wax, and premium fragrance/essential oils are used to create unique up-cycled candles for home decor and personal rituals. The traveller tin collection perfectly captures the ability to bring your simple rituals on the go with easy-to-carry candles. Whether you’re going abroad or sneaking off for a secret rendezvous with your lover, our tins are a perfect fit for any life and style.<br /><br />Our business methods include sustainable sourcing of our ingredients and re-purposing packaging wherever possible. We want our customers to reuse their candle canisters or have them refilled as part of our efforts to minimize ‘throw away’ in the home decor world. The fragrances are paraben-free, phthalate-free and non-toxic. This means that they are clean-burning and won't pollute the environment or your body while burning. The candles are vegan, contain no additives or manufactured colours and are even kosher!<br /><br /></div><br /><div class="blogger-post-footer">All Opinions Are My Own!</div>Kayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3957465572861863837.post-79860467270483343942020-06-21T22:53:00.003-04:002022-11-23T18:33:59.762-05:00How to be Mindful<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Throughout my cancer survivorship journey, many people have asked me what mindfulness is. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">What does mindfulness mean? How does it help?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Mindfulness helps you direct your attention to your experience as it unfolds throughout life. It trains you to respond skillfully to whatever is happening; good or bad. It helps you slow down and it helps you know yourself better. Mindfulness teaches us to be more resilient and leads to self-acceptance and compassion for others. Mindfulness helps us perform better and ultimately leads to a more enjoyable life.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Yesterday, I was doing a deep dive into the endless void of Pinterest and found a simple and direct quote from <b><a href="https://www.mindful.org/7-things-mindful-people-do-differently-and-how-to-get-started/" target="_blank"><span style="background-color: white; color: #111111;">Elisha Goldstein</span> on 7 things that mindful people do</a>.</b> I thought it was a great and easy way to summarize for people, how to begin their mindfulness journey. There are hundreds of resources that relate to different mindfulness advice and practices, but the sheer amount of information can sometimes be overwhelming. Start small, like with this blog post, and work your way to finding your own mindful rituals. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">If you would like to read the entire article in detail, <a href="https://www.mindful.org/7-things-mindful-people-do-differently-and-how-to-get-started/" target="_blank">check it out here</a>. Otherwise, I have taken some text extracts directly from the article on how to start your mindfulness journey.</span><br />
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<h4 style="text-align: left;"><b>7 Things Mindful People Do Differently + How To Start</b></h4>
<b><span style="font-family: inherit;">1. Approach everyday things with curiosity</span></b><br />
<span style="letter-spacing: 0.2px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Curiosity leads the mindful person to get back in touch with the wonders and possibilities of life.</span></span><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: inherit;">2. Forgive yourself; big or small</span></b><br />
<span style="letter-spacing: 0.2px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The simple phrase “forgive and invite” can be enormously helpful. When we get caught in an obstacle, we “forgive” ourselves for the time gone by, investigate the obstacle to learn from it, and then “invite” ourselves to begin again.</span></span><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: inherit;">3. Show gratitude for good moments, and grace for bad ones</span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.2px;">When you start </span><a href="https://www.mindful.org/?p=1797" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: black; letter-spacing: 0.2px;">paying attention to any emotion</a><span style="letter-spacing: 0.2px;"> you start to experience that it is an energy that is “in motion.” It has a certain nature of coming and going and in experiencing this we can naturally hold them more lightly. This enables us to not get so wrapped up in the difficult feelings, but instead, hold them with gentleness and tenderness.</span></span><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: inherit;">4. Practice compassion and nurture your connections</span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.mindful.org/?p=113" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: black; letter-spacing: 0.2px;">Compassion</a><span style="letter-spacing: 0.2px;"> can be defined as noticing suffering with an inclination to want to help in some way. Repeated practice of intentionally paying attention to ourselves with curious and caring attention sends the implicit message to our brain that we’re worth caring about. </span></span><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: inherit;">5. Make peace with imperfection</span></b><br />
<span style="letter-spacing: 0.2px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">As we start to practice being present we can’t help but see that we are not the only one who is imperfect. To be imperfect is to be human.</span></span><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: inherit;">6. Be vulnerable</span></b><br />
<span style="letter-spacing: 0.2px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">It takes courage to take the leap and be vulnerable, as we do this we begin to trust ourselves and others and in doing this we cultivate connection which allows us to feel safe and happy.</span></span><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: inherit;">7. Accept and appreciate that things come and go</span></b><br />
<span style="letter-spacing: 0.2px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">As we practice mindfulness, we come to understand that life becomes increasingly precious. We begin to put our phones down more often and open our eyes to the sacred moments all around us.</span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer">All Opinions Are My Own!</div>Kayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3957465572861863837.post-31520556335945816882020-03-31T15:47:00.001-04:002020-03-31T15:47:53.687-04:00Spring Reading List<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I think there is a limit to how much Netflix we can handle in the day. Instead of slouching into your couch potato form for a full 8 hours, try switching out some of those TV hours into reading hours.<br />
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I know reading isn't for everyone, but for those of you who do enjoy getting lost in a good book, like myself, then here is a curated list of novels/series that I have collected, started to make my own way through, and even finished. It's not like we're going anywhere anytime soon, so snuggle up with a good beverage and give your eyes a rest from the TV and explore some of these potential adventures below. That sounds super nerdy but you get the idea.<br />
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Since we are still in the midst of our social distancing due to COVID-19, don't go out to a bookstore to pick up anything. Thankfully, you can order these books online, so save yourself from going out of your house and check out <a href="https://www.amazon.ca/" target="_blank">Amazon</a> or <a href="https://www.chapters.indigo.ca/en-ca/" target="_blank">Indigo</a> online.<br />
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<b>The Clockmaker's Daughter: A Novel</b><br />
<i>Book by Kate Morton </i><br />
<a href="https://bit.ly/39DlOtj" target="_blank">https://bit.ly/39DlOtj</a><br />
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<b>Shadow and Bone</b><br />
<i>Book by Leigh Bardugo </i><br />
<a href="https://bit.ly/3aynlSA" target="_blank">https://bit.ly/3aynlSA</a><br />
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<b>Exit Strategy</b><br />
<i>Book by Kelley Armstrong</i><br />
<a href="https://bit.ly/2UxU5Wz">https://bit.ly/2UxU5Wz</a><br />
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<b>City Of The Lost: A Rockton Thriller (City of the Lost 1)</b><br />
<i>Book by Kelley Armstrong</i><br />
<a href="https://bit.ly/39quD9C">https://bit.ly/39quD9C</a><br />
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<b>Bitten: Women Of The Otherworld</b><br />
<i>Book by Kelley Armstrong</i><br />
<a href="https://bit.ly/3aynYeU">https://bit.ly/3aynYeU</a><br />
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<b>The Raven Boys (The Raven Cycle, Book 1): Book 1 of The Raven Cycle</b><br />
<i>Book by Maggie Stiefvater</i><br />
<a href="https://bit.ly/2xBh2ir">https://bit.ly/2xBh2ir</a><br />
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<b>Ysabel: A Novel</b><br />
<i>Book by Guy Gavriel Kay</i><br />
<a href="https://bit.ly/2JFx9yt">https://bit.ly/2JFx9yt</a><br />
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<b>The Shadow Of The Wind</b><br />
<i>Book by Carlos Ruiz Zafon</i><br />
<a href="https://bit.ly/39DmC1j">https://bit.ly/39DmC1j</a><br />
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<br /><div class="blogger-post-footer">All Opinions Are My Own!</div>Kayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3957465572861863837.post-76844491494070417582020-03-19T12:22:00.004-04:002022-11-23T18:59:49.791-05:00My Real Cancer Story, No Bullshit<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-e7Rl1GEdsws/Xm_A7Szg22I/AAAAAAABWoQ/6onOUEucdKggxMXONZHvE4B7TG0fqmNdACNcBGAsYHQ/s1600/IMG_20200204_093650_619.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1280" data-original-width="1600" height="512" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-e7Rl1GEdsws/Xm_A7Szg22I/AAAAAAABWoQ/6onOUEucdKggxMXONZHvE4B7TG0fqmNdACNcBGAsYHQ/s640/IMG_20200204_093650_619.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I was diagnosed with cancer on November 21</span><span style="background-color: transparent; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="vertical-align: super;">st</span></span><span style="background-color: transparent; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, 2014. I was 21 years old.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I really didn’t have any symptoms before my diagnosis, just a series of random events that lead me to the ER one night for a pulled muscle in my chest. </span><span style="background-color: transparent; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Turns out, after some x-rays and bloodwork, I was fine, or so I thought. A few days later I got a call for an emergency CT scan. I had the scan and was given a booklet of folded white paper held together by a single staple. The nurse who handed me the paper told me to bring it to my doctor.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Well, of course, I fucking opened it as soon as I left the room. I don't remember exactly what it said, but as I skimmed the typed text, a few words stuck out to me: suspected lymphoma, masses, 8cm in the chest cavity.
I</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">n the following weeks, I received further testing; a bone marrow biopsy, CT and PET scans, and hundreds of tubes of blood work. In November I had my diagnosis. Stage 3 type A Hodgkin’s Lymphoma with tumour all clustered along my collar bone and by my spleen. </span></span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;">I don’t really remember exactly what went through my head that day of my original diagnosis, but I think it was something along the lines of, “okay I have cancer, what’s next because I have an exam in a few weeks.”</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #202124; white-space: pre-wrap;">I underwent a year of chemo and radiation and somehow managed to stay in school and work at my part-time job – this was my escape from cancer, somewhere I could be without thinking about how sick I was. And also somewhere I could be around normal people. </span><span style="color: #202124; white-space: pre-wrap;">I was studying fine art and writing at the University of Toronto and poured all of my emotions into my practice and into my writing.
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I finished my chemotherapy and radiation treatment in June of 2015. In September, I went back for a follow-up and found out that my cancer was back. I had relapsed. </span></span><span style="color: #202124; font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;">My relapsed diagnosis was grey zone lymphoma, which is a rare mutated blood cancer. My new tumours were floating between my heart and lungs. I went through another year of chemo, radiation, and a stem cell transplant using my own stem cells.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;">I remember what cancer felt like, but not how cancer felt like. </span><span style="background-color: transparent; white-space: pre-wrap;">From the first day back in 2014, when I was diagnosed with cancer, I didn’t allow myself to feel anything; I acted like I was in control around my friends and would always downplay the severity of my illness. Around my family, I put on a hard exterior and didn’t want them to talk about my cancer. </span><span style="color: #202124; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I never wanted to talk about my cancer. I never wanted to admit that I even had cancer, or when I needed help, and in doing so I felt alone and isolated all the time. </span><span style="background-color: transparent; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I put up walls, walls that kept my friends from helping me, and I think, more importantly, walls that pushed away my emotions, and any feelings that I had.
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After my second year of treatment, I was not a nice person to be around. I was a major fucking bitch. I was angry all the time, I was edgy, moody, and mean to everyone around me, including the people who loved me the most. I created this energy of hate and anger and carried it around with me for years.
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Looking back, I can say that my family and I dealt with the practicality of cancer: appointments, food, nutrition, alternative medicine, exercise, what have you. But we never really talked. </span></span><span style="background-color: transparent; white-space: pre-wrap;">We never talked about how we felt like a family, how I felt having cancer, or how my parents felt about my diagnosis. </span></span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;">We closed ourselves off and I was the ring leader because I couldn't deal with being sick while doing the treatments at the same time. I never wanted support, I was too proud to ask for help and that really changed our relationship negatively.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #202124; font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;">At the time, I was the only 21-year-old I knew who had cancer, and even though I had a support system at home I still felt like no one really got it. I sank into a deep depression of self-hate and worthlessness, my anxiety spiking and spiralling. I remember covering all the mirrors in my room because I couldn't stand to see myself and how I changed physically and mentally. I knew I was awful and I couldn't face myself or change myself. I was in denial about my cancer and about how it was making me act and feel.
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In my survivorship, I realized that by not addressing my emotions and talking/dealing with my feelings, I was actually making myself sicker. This sickness started to spread into different parts of my life and my relationships with my parents and close friends. Hate, anger, pain, sadness, and a loss of identity were all I felt all the time.
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</span>To this day I’m still trying to grasp and understand my emotions and feelings, trying to remember how I felt or wanted to feel but with no context anymore like there is this big two-year black hole in my memory. I don't have the pieces to put it back together anymore and I grieve for my cancer self, wishing I had embraced my emotions at the moment and was honest. This is still something that really upsets me.
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It wasn’t until 2017 that I decided to get help. I remember sitting with my mom watching TV and telling her that I think I had PTSD, major anxiety, and depression. </span></span><span style="font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;">I wanted to start to heal. </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">My first step was, as funny as it sounds, admitting that I needed help. </span></span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;">I finally was acknowledging that I needed to forgive myself before I could move forward.
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After getting in touch with a Psychologist through Princess Margaret Hospital in Toronto, I started going to therapy. I slowly began to open up about how I felt, about my spiralling anxiety and my dips of depression. I talked about my relationships with friends, family, and my boyfriend at the time. Talking to someone really helped me unload some issues I didn't know I was still gripping so hard onto. Over the next two years, I continued going to therapy and I also started being more open with the people in my life; telling them how I was feeling and finally talking about cancer.
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Eventually, I decided to go on medication because I just felt like I wasn’t improving to the point where my quality of life was stable...I just wanted to be happy again. Being on medication for your mental health is nothing to be ashamed of; sometimes we need help because our body balance is just off enough to cause us daily pain and suffering. I thought by keeping everything inside was being brave, but it wasn't. I didn't want to suffer anymore. Being brave is about being honest, and for me, that meant that I needed a little extra help to balance my body and take that edge off. After 5 years of being stuck in a void of darkness and pain, I can finally say that I have found my happiness and will to live again.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #202124; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">In 2017 I discovered Young Adult Cancer Canada (YACC). </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I went to a young adult cancer retreat in British Columbia and met a group of strangers who helped me start my life again with their honesty, vulnerability, and their willingness to share the deepest moments of their lives. Connecting with these people was really the start of my new life.
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For me, the most important thing I learned at the retreat was, “it’s okay to not be okay” and that addressing your emotions when you have them is the best way to acknowledge and work through them. </span></span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;">Cancer fucking sucks. You do not have to be brave all the time or be positive and hide how you really feel. To me, b</span><span style="color: #202124; font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;">eing brave isn’t about positivity. Sometimes being brave means allowing yourself to feel angry or scared or sad, and saying, “Hey I’m not okay right now, I need to talk about it”. That is okay and you should find strength in being about to have that honest conversation with yourself.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #202124; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">In 2018 I created a <a href="https://www.thisinfernalracket.com/" target="_blank">Blog</a> and <a href="https://www.youtube.com/kaylatremblett" target="_blank">YouTube channel</a> – called This Infernal Racket: My Life, After Cancer – where I now discuss my life during and more importantly my life after cancer. </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">By talking and advocating about my cancer experience, I am healing myself but also helping provide information to other cancer thrivers on things that I couldn't find when I was sick. I found peace in sharing my story and emotions with this new young adult cancer community that I was now a part of.
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Along the way, I have found that others have reached out to me and made connections and told me that I helped them get through a day or treatment, or moment – and that in itself is so rewarding. One morning as I was getting ready for work, I got a message through my Instagram from a man in California who was just about to undergo his own stem cell transplant. He told me that after reading my latest blog post and exploring my social platforms that he felt comforted by the fact that there was life after this disease,</span></span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;"> “I didn’t know there could be light at the end of all this but your stories have shown me there is, and I can’t wait for that”.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">In my life after cancer, I have accomplished a lot more than I thought I ever would. I really didn’t think I could be happy again, but here I am really living a mindful and happy life.
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;">I’ve travelled to many countries, graduated from university, and completed a master's degree. I’ve built my own business, become a peer supporter within the cancer community, participated in public speaking events such as STARS in conjunction with the Annie Parker Foundation, and even gotten into heavy lifting which was never something I thought I could do.
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This all sounds cool but really but </span><span style="color: #202124; font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I'm still learning how to heal. Every day I try and practise being mindful of myself which could include things like self-awareness, honesty and sometimes being selfish and saying no to others. I want to show people that there is life after this disease, and it's worth living for and that </span><span style="color: #202124; font-family: inherit; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">you</span><span style="color: #202124; font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> are worth living for. </span></div>
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<div class="blogger-post-footer">All Opinions Are My Own!</div>Kayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3957465572861863837.post-40448391260222698632020-03-09T21:38:00.001-04:002022-11-23T18:59:03.871-05:00A Weekend In Vegas<span style="font-family: inherit;">In early February I was feeling the winter blues and decided to book a weekend trip to Vegas with some friends. Here is my summary of my first-timer tips for a weekend in Vegas!<br /></span><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br />HOTELS</span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">You can't go wrong with any of the hotels, they are all very accommodating and accessible. My top picks to stay at and/or explore when you want something to do are as follows:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://mirage.mgmresorts.com/en.html" target="_blank">The Mirage</a>: such a beautiful hotel with lots of natural elements, an aquarium and dolphins.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.caesars.com/ballys-las-vegas" target="_blank">Bally's</a>: we stayed in this hotel and we enjoyed the simplicity and the outdoor market</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://bellagio.mgmresorts.com/en.html" target="_blank">Bellagio</a>: stunning fountains, and a beautiful artistic interior</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.caesars.com/caesars-palace" target="_blank">Caesars Palace</a>: I would not stay in this hotel but the built-in mall, casino and restaurants are stellar!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.cosmopolitanlasvegas.com/" target="_blank">The Cosmopolitan</a>: so fucking beautiful + secret bars and treats</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.venetian.com/" target="_blank">The Venetian</a>: a stunning, slice of Roman-inspired architecture with beautiful Renaissance-style canals and stores<br /></span><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br />FOOD & DRINK</span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Every place we went to was very accommodating to my food allergies and offered lots of menu options for almost any diet:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.cafeamericanovegas.com/" target="_blank">Americano</a>: we went here 3 times for dinner and breakfast, epic</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.margaritavillelasvegas.com/" target="_blank">Margaritaville</a>: delicious fish sandwiches and margaritas</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://mirage.mgmresorts.com/en/restaurants/pantry.html" target="_blank">The Pantry</a>: French-inspired restaurant open basically 24/7 with freshly baked sweets and treats</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://noburestaurants.com/las-vegas-at-ballys/home/" target="_blank">Nobu</a>: the sushi will melt in your mouth, this is not an exaggeration</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://www.ramen-katanaya.com/" target="_blank">Ramen-ya</a>: RAMEN, HELLO!!!! Cheap, delicious and easy</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.alexxasbar.com/" target="_blank">Alexxa's</a>: a giant bowl of alcohol + brunch</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://fattuesday.com/locations/" target="_blank">Fat Tuesdays</a>: slushy alcoholic beverages in portable cups...need I say more?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.caesars.com/caesars-palace/things-to-do/vanderpump#.XmbpmpNKhSw" target="_blank">Vanderpump Cocktail Garden</a>: a boujee ass cocktail bar with dark Alice in Wonderland vibes - get the velveteen rabbit drink!<br /></span><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br />THINGS TO DO</span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.caesars.com/flamingo-las-vegas/shows/rupauls-drag-race-live#.XmblwJNKhSw" target="_blank">Drag Show</a>: this is a great event to hit up with some friends for drinks, laughs and drag!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://omniaclubs.com/las-vegas/" target="_blank">OMNIA</a>: buy tickets ahead of time, good music and atmosphere (see Zedd if you can)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://thehauntedmuseum.com/" target="_blank">Zak Bagans' Haunted Museum</a>: hands down the best spooky time, a great tour with lots of history and horror</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.neonmuseum.org/" target="_blank">Neon Museum</a>: an interesting set up of cool exhibit spaces, best to see it at night</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.vegas.com/attractions/" target="_blank">The Strip</a>: just explore the north and south ends at your own leisure or with a drink</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.caesars.com/linq/high-roller" target="_blank">High Roller</a>: 30 minutes on a Ferris wheel with an all-you-can-drink bar for $45</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://vegasexperience.com/" target="_blank">Fremont Street</a>: a must-see at night, with lots of lights and fun!<br /></span><br />
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<div class="blogger-post-footer">All Opinions Are My Own!</div>Kayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3957465572861863837.post-26261848012725679962020-01-09T18:38:00.001-05:002022-11-23T18:35:41.250-05:00Dear Diary: My Cancer Meal Plan<div style="border: 0px; margin-bottom: 1.5em; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: 700;">December 8, 2014</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">After my diagnosis, I met with my Naturopathic Doctor and went over a new dietary plan for my treatment regime. Carol (my amazing Naturopathic Doctor/ lifesaver/ ass-kicker) gave me a great article to read about a type of supplement called <a href="https://href.li/?http://www.la-press.com/curcuma-contra-cancer-curcumin-and-hodgkins-lymphoma-article-a3819" rel="noreferrer" style="border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration-line: none; vertical-align: baseline;" target="_blank" title="Curcumin">Curcumin</a> that helps target cancer cells. Alongside that, she advised me to start using Vitamin D daily and designed a diet plan. I also decided, on my own (but will tell my Oncologist) to start using <a href="https://href.li/?http://www.livestrong.com/article/549492-what-is-biosil/" rel="noreferrer" style="border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration-line: none; vertical-align: baseline;" target="_blank" title="BioSil">BioSil</a> to help the growth and strengthening of hair, skin, nails and bones. I’m worried obviously about losing my hair and would like to keep as much as I can for my entire treatment. I can rock a hat. I cannot handle losing everything completely. Cutting my hair into a bob is also an option, as long as I can keep as much hair as possible.<br /></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">I also have <a href="https://href.li/?http://www.niams.nih.gov/Health_Info/Fibromyalgia/" rel="noreferrer" style="border: 0px; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration-line: none; vertical-align: baseline;" target="_blank" title="Fibromyalgia">Fibromyalgia</a>, which is a chronic muscular-skeletal pain disorder that has no cure. Eating well, and avoiding certain foods is the only way, for me, to combat this illness. I’m not a pill popper so nutrition is how I usually help myself feel better – alongside exercise. I am a fitness junkie. I love to swim, run, bike, skate, dance and walk. A usual week for me includes 3-4 days of cardio + strength training and a full day of swimming. I am also a lazy couch potato who loves nothing more than chomping on some chips and watching the Food Network.<br /></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">So here is what my ND and I came up with for a food guideline of what to eat and avoid during my treatments. * means very important. </span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;"><b><br /></b></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;"><b>Veggies: slightly cooked, sauteed with garlic/onions</b></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Broccoli*</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Kale*</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Cauliflower</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Brussel Sprouts</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: 700;">Fruits: x2 per day max </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Blueberry*</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Pomegranate*</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Apple</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">All berries in general</span></div>
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<br /><span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: 700;">Protein: </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Lentils (mung beans, kidney beans, chickpeas, etc)</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Hummus</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Chicken</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Turkey</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Fish</span></div>
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<br /><span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: 700;">Fats: to be used alongside other foods</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Chia*</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Flax</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Hemp</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Avocado</span></div>
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<br /><span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: 700;">Liquids: 1-2 litres daily (4 cups = 1 L) </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Water*</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Organic green tea*</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Smoothies</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Bone & soup broth</span></div>
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<br /><span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: 700;">Exercise: only when able</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Simple movements & stretches</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Walking</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Light Yoga</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Light Swimming</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">No weights</span></div>
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<br /><span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: 700;">NO: Not allowed</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Deli meats</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">BBQ blackened meats</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Artificial sweeteners</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Sugar in general</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Dairy (+ soy)</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Alcohol</span></div>
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<br /><span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: 700;">NO: Moves Lymph Nodes around exciting them</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Sauna</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Hot tub</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Hot pools</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit;">Massages</span></div>
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<br /><span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">There we have it, my beat cancer plan. Many of these things are on my regular meal plan because of my dietary needs, however, this list is specifically made to help support your body's health and attack the bad cells. Take this plan as a guide on what foods to focus on during your cancer treatment. Now it's time to get ready for my PICC line...</span></div>
<div class="blogger-post-footer">All Opinions Are My Own!</div>Kayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3957465572861863837.post-9750941967685839092019-12-31T10:48:00.003-05:002022-11-23T18:36:34.399-05:00Cancer & Steroids: How to Heal & Detox Your BodyIf you know, you know. Steroids are a common cancer medical treatment option. They can be used in conjunction with other chemotherapy medications during and after cancer treatment. Steroids work by decreasing inflammation and the activity of the immune system. From what I understand from my own experience, the three steroids used in cancer treatment are <a href="http://chemocare.com/chemotherapy/drug-info/Prednisolone.aspx" target="_blank">prednisolone</a>, <a href="http://chemocare.com/chemotherapy/drug-info/Methylprednisolone.aspx" target="_blank">methylprednisolone</a> and <a href="http://chemocare.com/chemotherapy/drug-info/dexamethasone.aspx" target="_blank">dexamethasone</a>.<br />
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Overall, steroids can be used to actually kill cancer itself, reduce inflammation, suppress the body's immune response (after a transplant for example) and reduce sickness when having chemotherapy. They can also improve your appetite and make you gain weight....sometimes this is good but not always and not in the long term. I remember during my treatments, I begged the doctors to take away the steroids but since they were part of my treatment protocol, it wasn't possible.<br />
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During my cancer treatment, I was on the dexamethasone steroid for 2 years. It was used in conjunction with chemotherapy as part of my treatment to kill cancer, but also to suppress my immune response, which is typical for leukemia and lymphoma. What no one told me was how much steroids would fuck up my body and then how long it would take me to detox them out of my body.<br />
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One of the toughest problems with steroids is trying to offset the swelling, 'moon face' and huge salty cravings. Recognizing that you will succumb to all these symptoms is a hard pill to swallow. Try and be gentle with your self-criticism, this isn't your fault.<br />
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I recently stumbled upon a fellow cancer thriver looking for advice on how to de-bloat from steroids and reduce the 'moon face' symptoms. During my own cancer experience, I was constantly (multiple times a day) looking for ways to combat steroid side effects. So here we are. Here is my advice on things that ACTUALLY WORKED for detoxing and de-bloating your body after the use of steroids.<br />
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<b>Please keep in mind that although these things so help, it took me 2+ years of consistent holistic healing to de-puff my body. This is a commitment to your detoxing your body of poisons so be patient and kind to yourself because it is a process!</b><br />
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<b>Dry Brushing</b><br />
Dry brushing is a technique that uses...well a dry brush to stimulate your lymphatic system and encourage movement in the body. Increased blood flow from dry brushing leads to the release of swelling and it decreases bloating. I recommend dry brushing in downward strokes away from the centre of the face/body. Skin is the largest organ of the body and typically will eliminate 10-15% of our body toxins - so we obviously need to respect it and take care of it! Because dry brushing boosts your blood flow in the lymphatic system, many naturopathic doctors will also recommend it to minimize bloating.<br />
<a href="https://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-26351/a-5step-guide-to-dry-brushing-your-face-for-brighter-skin.html" target="_blank"><span style="background-color: #ead1dc; color: black;">Read more on dry brushing here.</span></a><br />
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<b>Facial Massages/ Lymphatic Face Roller</b><br />
Similar to dry brushing, facial messages either with hands or a massage tool/roller can increase lymph drainage and reduce bloating. If you don't have a partner to help with your facial massage then it's very easy to do on yourself. <a href="https://www.mindbodygreen.com/articles/how-to-debloat-your-face-after-thanksgiving" target="_blank">MBG Lifestyle</a> says, <span style="font-family: inherit;"><i>"U<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">se light circles and keep your fingers glued to the same patch of skin so you move the skin itself in circles. This works with lymph because it's superficial, sits right under the skin, and responds to a more gentle touch. That will be lymph-activating. Lymph nodes stimulate facial puffiness." </span></i></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: inherit;">Jade rollers are a great facial massaging tool. You can buy them almost anywhere and use them at room temperature or chilled. The movement from these massagers will also help your skin absorb serums and creams, which is all we really want in life am I right? </span><br />
<a href="https://www.elle.com/uk/beauty/skin/reviews/g32585/best-face-massage-tools/" style="background-color: #ead1dc;" target="_blank"><span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"><span style="caret-color: rgb(34, 34, 34);">Read more on the </span></span><span style="color: #222222;"><span style="caret-color: rgb(34, 34, 34);">benefits</span></span><span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"><span style="caret-color: rgb(34, 34, 34);"> of facial massagers here.</span></span></a><br />
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<b>Lemon & Hot Water</b><br />This a simple thing you can add to your morning to help with bloating. I have to warn you that during chemo this may not be as great of an option because lemons are acidic and if you suffer from mouth sores, then this may be more painful than helpful. Make sure you test it out before to see if it's right for you. For your after-cancer life, this is perfectly safe to drink. Lemons are a natural diuretic and when added to hot water, they can help reduce the salt retained in the body and help with bloating.<br />
<a href="https://www.insider.com/is-drinking-lemon-water-good-for-you-2018-2#i-was-less-bloated-1" target="_blank"><span style="background-color: #ead1dc; color: black;">Read this experiment with lemon & hot water.</span></a><br />
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<b>Yoga</b><br />
I feel like yoga is the cure for everything....or at least it is for me. During my second year of cancer, I was so swollen from steroids but also from potassium supplements (which I stopped taking immediately). Yoga was the only thing to help with my abdominal bloating. Certain poses stimulate your abdominal organs while other more twisting poses massage your abdomen. Both are great for releasing gas and aiding bloating.<br />
<a href="https://www.health.com/health/gallery/0,,20737691,00.html" target="_blank"><span style="background-color: #ead1dc; color: black;">You can find some good positions and modifications for body bloating here!</span></a><br />
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<b>Buy Your Food Before</b><br />
Steroids make you crazy-hungry. I wanted to eat everything in my sight no matter what it was. It also makes your salt cravings skyrocket so make sure you don't drive by a Mcdonald's. The best thing to help combat this is to do your grocery shopping before you take your meds. It's so so hard to eat healthy and holistic for your entire cancer experience, and I don't think you should. I believe in the 80/20 rule but steroids make it hard to stay focused. By grocery shopping before your treatments, you'll lessen the amount of junk food in your immediate reach. If you can't see it then you may not feel the urge to eat it. If you want something salty, make your own fries. If you can control the amount of salt that goes into your food then you're doing yourself a favour. Miso soup also really helps the salty cravings!<br />
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I don't think there is an exact formula to detox your body from steroids, but with time, commitment to reading food labels and adjusting your diet and personal exercise you can and will get better. I hope that some of these suggestions can help you as they helped me during my cancer experience.<br />
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Do you have any other tips for detoxing your body from steroids? Drop a comment below!<div class="blogger-post-footer">All Opinions Are My Own!</div>Kayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.com28tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3957465572861863837.post-57386222491521173012019-12-11T16:38:00.004-05:002019-12-11T20:21:22.301-05:00Easy Overnight Oats RecipeOvernight oats are such an easy breakfast whether you're in a rush or have some times to relax in the morning. Oatmeal is a super nutritious meal to add into your diet; oats are loaded with fibre, protein, magnesium, potassium and omega 3 fatty acids. Oats are naturally sugar free, an added bonus for all my sugar free fam out there.<br />
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Hot oatmeal with a sprinkle of brown sugar has always been a staple in my household but overnight oats are now a new favourite, and I've gotten a few friends hooked on it. Overnight oats are raw oats that are soaked overnight in some form of liquid like almond milk or coconut milk. The oats absorb the liquid and soften them, the same way that cooking them would.<br />
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<span style="background-color: #ead1dc;"><a href="https://www.bobsredmill.com/blog/healthy-living/5-reasons-try-overnight-oats/" style="background-color: #ead1dc;" target="_blank">If you want to read more about the benefits of overnight oats, check out this article on Bob's Red Mill</a></span><br />
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There are HUNDREDS are overnight oats recipes on the internet, so take a look and see which one tickles your flavour fancy. Personally, I prefer more simple overnight oats with a side of berries, or a nut topping.<br />
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<b>Overnight Oats Recipe</b><br />
1 cup of gluten free oats<br />
1/2 tsp of cinnamon<br />
1 tsp maple syrup OR coconut sugar<br />
1 tbsp hemp seeds<br />
1 tbsp flax seeds<br />
1 tsp MCT oil<br />
1 cup of nut milk (I like almond) or enough to cover oats<br />
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<b>Optional Extras</b><br />
Nut Butter<br />
Raisons<br />
Dried cranberries<br />
Pumplin Seeds<br />
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Add the oats, seeds and spices to a small mason jar (mine is from Muji). Add in your nut milk, enough to cover the oats up. Mix everything together or put the lid on and give it a shake. That's it! Store in the fridge overnight and enjoy in the AM. If you forget to do it the night before, switch out your regular oats for some kind of fast cooking oats. These will absorb and 'cook' faster so you can eat them as soon as you get to work.<br />
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Let me know what your favourite overnight oat flavour combo is!<div class="blogger-post-footer">All Opinions Are My Own!</div>Kayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3957465572861863837.post-48085583987497996842019-11-30T20:20:00.001-05:002022-11-23T18:40:56.637-05:00New York City Guide<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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A few weeks ago I made my way back to the city that never sleeps aka New York. I've been there a lot in the last few years and so I figured I should obviously put together a post rounding up my recommendations on places to visit, shop, eat and explore! I will continue to update this the more I explore the city over the years :)<br />
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New York is a huge city so I would recommend organizing your days and exploring specific neighbourhoods...because cabs are expensive. It's a great city for walking so take your time and you'll be sure to always find something new.<br />
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<b>FOOD & DRINK</b><br />
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<a href="https://www.thebutchersdaughter.com/" target="_blank">The Butchers Daughter</a>: My go-to for solid vegan food, fresh juices and yummy hot drinks.<br />
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<a href="https://www.fornino.com/" target="_blank">Fornino Pizza</a>: The best gluten-free pizza I have ever eaten in my entire life...I am not exaggerating. The location in Brooklyn is my fave.<br />
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<a href="https://www.brooklyndiner.com/" target="_blank">Brooklyn Diner</a>: Anytime I head to Times Square and need a place to eat, I hit up this spot. I've been going here for 4 years and have yet to be a disappointment. Old school classy diner vibes & amazing comfort food.<br />
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<a href="http://bocaphe.com/" target="_blank">Bochape</a>: A tight squeeze but worth it for amazing and fresh Vietnamese food and unique drinks.<br />
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<a href="https://www.matchaful.com/" target="_blank">Matchaful</a>: Pretty obvious...it's a matcha cafe in Soho; with delicious drinks and decor.<br />
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<a href="https://marthascountrybakery.com/" target="_blank">Martha's Country Bakery</a>: A Brooklyn classic, the eat-in bakery has vegan and gluten-free options and delicious drinks. Get the Chai tea.<br />
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<a href="https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=2ahUKEwjg5NqFhIjmAhUFKH0KHWksDpcQFjAAegQIHxAD&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.allswellnyc.com%2F&usg=AOvVaw0E6sxdE5UMk-tT9VeYnyi4" target="_blank">Allswell</a>: Intimate little restaurant in Brooklyn, has great food, a cool atmosphere and friendly staff.<br />
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<a href="http://www.saraghina.com/" target="_blank">Saraghina Restaurant</a>: A pizza (gf options) and tapas restaurant in Brooklyn with delicious food specials and good music.<br />
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<a href="https://bagel-point.com/" target="_blank">Bagel Point</a>: Bagels....do I need to say more? Gluten-free, vegan and dairy-free options are available.<br />
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<b>SHOPPING</b><br />
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<a href="https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=2ahUKEwj19t2QiIjmAhVLeawKHSAdDeIQFjAAegQIERAC&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.glossier.com%2F&usg=AOvVaw2TtcyMedU9qisY2CH810rx" target="_blank">Glossier</a>: The flagship store for the brand and worth a visit. There are only 2 shops in the US so you may as well stop by.<br />
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<a href="https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=2ahUKEwjmwZKdiIjmAhVMcq0KHcxQDsIQFjAAegQIIRAC&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.doverstreetmarket.com%2F&usg=AOvVaw1cKxEWDSCtjZ-xy2Ee4UrW" target="_blank">Dover Street Market</a>: Museum meets store, a great shopping experience.<br />
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<a href="https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=2ahUKEwin-L-kiIjmAhUNC6wKHY9KAZUQFjAAegQIDxAC&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.therealreal.com%2F&usg=AOvVaw2DmQtt8nj-RPKc7xC9BwNv" target="_blank">The Real Real</a>: Designer consignment + a cool patio and cafe in the basement!<br />
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<a href="https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=2ahUKEwjsiJOriIjmAhUMC6wKHQaEACkQFjAAegQIEhAC&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.harney.com%2F&usg=AOvVaw3bbetHS4epHDIsRmfuBpoU" target="_blank">Harney & Sons</a>: A tea shop that looks like a library; great tea selection and decent prices.<br />
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<a href="https://beaconscloset.com/" target="_blank">Beacon's Closet</a>: Thrifting gold mine located all over the city. The shop in Brooklyn on 5th Avenue is a good place to start.<br />
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<a href="https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=2ahUKEwie4uvLiYjmAhUDMawKHR3JD2MQFjAAegQIEhAC&url=https%3A%2F%2Fflyingtiger.com%2F&usg=AOvVaw2T5sKYBQjP7etcELJ3S5X5" target="_blank">Flying Tiger Copenhagen</a>: Cool little Danish store with knick-knacks and household gadgets. Kind of like the marketplace in Ikea.<br />
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<a href="https://www.louandgrey.com/" target="_blank">Lou & Grey</a>: The SOFTEST clothing you will ever buy. Simple shapes, fun colours and cozy sets of loungewear.<br />
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<a href="https://www.catbirdnyc.com/" target="_blank">Catbird</a>: Great spot in Brooklyn for beautiful jewellery.<br />
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<a href="https://www.awokevintage.com/" target="_blank">Awoke Vintage</a>: Cook vintage store with a curated collection of goods from clothing to jewellery to art and shoes!<br />
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<b>TO DO</b><br />
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<a href="http://www.chelseamarket.com/" target="_blank">Chelsea Market</a>: Your one-stop shop for food, artist markets, groceries and drinks. An indoor haven for the city explorer.<br />
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<a href="https://www.thehighline.org/" target="_blank">The High Line</a>: Grad a coffee and go for a walk in this manmade park above the city.<br />
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<a href="https://www.moma.org/" target="_blank">MoMa</a>: Museum of Modern Art, cool art and good for a rainy day.<br />
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<a href="http://www.centralparknyc.org/" target="_blank">Central Park</a>: A zoo, cool statues, nice trees and peace, love and understanding. The park is massive and it's great for an afternoon stroll.<br />
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<a href="http://dumbonyc.com/" target="_blank">DUMBO</a>: The entire Dumbo area is very cool and unique. It's worth a day trip to explore and grab some delicious food.<br />
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<a href="https://www.metmuseum.org/" target="_blank">MET</a>: A huge museum with cool exhibits...but also just cool to sit on the steps and people watch.<br />
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<a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2017/03/29/theater/how-to-get-cheap-theater-tickets-including-hamilton.html" target="_blank">Broadway</a>: Go see a show! NYC has hundreds of shows playing every single night. I use this app called <u>TodayTix</u> to see what's playing and the best price for tickets.<br />
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<a href="https://www.smorgasburg.com/" target="_blank">Smorgasburg Market</a>: Indoor/Outdoor market depending on the season. Great vintage goods, thrifting, food and handmade goods. Located in Williamsburg.<br />
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<a href="https://brooklynbased.com/2014/01/29/guide-to-bedford-avenue-brooklyn-from-greenpoint-to-broadway/" target="_blank">Bedford Ave</a>: An iconic street in Brooklyn for cool shopping and food experiences/<div class="blogger-post-footer">All Opinions Are My Own!</div>Kayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3957465572861863837.post-49682395919861114932019-11-08T09:29:00.001-05:002022-11-23T18:37:14.765-05:00The Best Vintage Clothing Shopping in TorontoI love vintage shopping. The idea of rummaging through old racks and piles of clothing and finding that perfect item makes me so happy. I love a good luxury item but nothing beats finding something that you weren't looking for and definitely need.<br />
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I get asked all the time where my favourite vintage/thrift shopping stores are in Toronto, and on a recent Instagram poll, you guys wanted me to write a post + film a video on my Top Vintage Clothing Stores in Toronto. So I've compiled a list that will take you around Toronto to some of my favourite shops and have you vintage shop in Toronto like a local.<br />
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<b><a href="http://houseofvintage-toronto.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">House of Vintage | Parkdale</a></b><br />
Located in Parkdale, this spot is a perfectly handpicked curated stock of beautiful men and womenswear. With items ranging from the 1920-1980s, House of Vintage has awesome jackets, leather coats, denim and band shirts alongside plenty of vintage bags.<br />
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<b><a href="http://publicbutter.com/" target="_blank">Public Butter | Parkdale</a></b><br />
Across the street from House of Vintage, Public Butter is a massive store that sells basically everything. Furniture, accessories, clothing, art and weird mannequins, the store curated mainly 80s-90s style picks and everything grunge.<br />
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<b><a href="https://chosen-vintage.com/" target="_blank">Chosen Vintage | West Queen West</a></b><br />
Probably one of my all-time favourite stores to shop and stare at. Even if you don't buy anything, just a walk through the shop lets you admire hand-selected treasures and vintage basics. This spot is super cool and caters to both men and women with prices ranging from mid to high range and styles from the 70s-90s. The shop is now located above <a href="https://www.blogto.com/fashion/ruins-toronto/" target="_blank">Ruins</a> on the second floor.<br />
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<b><a href="https://www.instagram.com/peopleschampvintage/?hl=en" target="_blank">People's Champ Vintage | Roncesvalles</a></b><br />
A very cool shop with an amazing selection of brand and designer pieces. The prices are a little higher but well worth a browse, I have found so many treasures here. The shop has a well-curated collection of items that you won't see anywhere else. The owners and staff are friendly and helpful plus are consistently posting daily pieces to Instagram.<br />
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<b><a href="https://blackmarkettoronto.com/" target="_blank">Black Market Vintage | Queen Street West</a></b><br />
A staple store in Toronto's vintage scene; the shop specializes in graphic tees and punk rock basics for a fee of 10$! How can you go wrong? If you're looking for grungy vintage basics then this is your new favourite store.<br />
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<a href="https://www.subrosavintage.com/" target="_blank"><b>Sub-Rosa Vintage | Kensington Market</b></a><br />
One of Toronto's BEST vintage clothing stores (as stated by The Culture Trip). This second-hand shop is nestled in the Kensington Market streets and focuses on trendy/vintage designer pieces for both men and women. With good prices and a huge selection of goods from shoes to bags to wedding dresses and more, you're definitely going to want to spend some time thrifting through this epic shop.<br />
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<b><a href="http://www.bungalow.to/Default.asp?id=home&l=1" target="_blank">Bungalow | Kensington Market</a></b><br />
Do you need a vintage rock n' roll shirt? Or maybe a sexy dress? Oh, I know, you need some danish inspired furniture for your home. Look no further than Bungalow, another perfect spot for your vintage dreams to come true. The store curates collector pieces from the 40s-60s but also hosts modern-day designers and clothing from non-vintage vendors. This shop really has it all from home accessories to worn-in jeans and stylish outerwear.<br />
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<a href="http://www.mamalovesyouvintage.com/" target="_blank"><b>Mama Loves You Vintage | Queen Street West</b></a><br />
This store is pretty unique bringing you handpicked pieces from a mother-daughter duo with over 20 years of experience in the vintage field. With items that range from the 1940s-1970s, Mama Loves you is your best stop for iconic pieces sure to make a statement at any event.<br />
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Those are my top stops for vintage shopping in Toronto. I hope you love them as much as I do, and if you stop to shop let me know what you find!<br />
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<br /><div class="blogger-post-footer">All Opinions Are My Own!</div>Kayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3957465572861863837.post-75851808434899561562019-09-24T10:17:00.002-04:002022-11-23T18:42:27.212-05:00Exploring Finland: Food, Shopping + More<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Back in 2018 my parents took the <a href="https://www.ancestrydna.ca/kits/?gclsrc=aw.ds&s_kwcid=ancestry+dna+test&gclid=Cj0KCQjwiILsBRCGARIsAHKQWLMKfGxUXmR51Cuhgf1k6Wdhd1CYY8lGIDzstEi6-F9mANrMr4vfsj8aArrlEALw_wcB&o_xid=81644&o_lid=81644&o_sch=Paid+Search+Brand" target="_blank">Ancestry DNA test</a> and discovered that we have Finnish Heritage, 20% to be exact! My mom is from Estonia and my dad is from Newfoundland, so to find out that both of my parents shared Scandinavian/Finnish ancestry was pretty cool.<br />
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I decided I wanted to travel back to my home country Estonia to explore and visit family. Since there is no direct route to Estonia, travellers often have to stop in another country beforehand to switch airlines or to take a boat. I pitched the idea to mom that we should go to Finland for a few days and explore the country before taking the ferry that crosses the Baltic Sea to Estonia. She agreed and we booked our tickets!<br />
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Visiting Finland has been on my to-do travel list for a while now and I was so excited when we booked our trip. During our 5 days in the country, we explored the coastline, Helsinki city as well as a few smaller towns and islands.<br />
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In today's post, I wanted to share my travels through this unique country, what I did and suggestions on places to eat, shop, explore and more! Be sure to watch my <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ji59CNxz12o" target="_blank">Finland Travel Vlog</a> for more details and fun moments!<br />
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<b><a href="https://www.visitfinland.com/helsinki/" target="_blank">Discover Helsinki</a></b><br />
Helsinki was such an interesting city and I can see myself heading there again for some more exploring. With Soviet-era architecture, the city is almost all cobblestone roads with large square terraces. The vibrant seaside city has a cool laid back vibe with lots of green spaces, bars, cafes and restaurants. Easy to explore on foot, Helsinki has some amazing shops like famous designer <a href="https://www.marimekko.com/" target="_blank">Marimekko</a> as well as boutiques like <a href="https://moko.fi/in-english/" target="_blank">Moko</a>. The city is bustling but keep in mind that places often close early to make time for eating, drinking and chatting with friends in the evening.<br />
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<b><a href="https://www.visitfinland.com/article/summertown-porvoo/" target="_blank">Day Trip to Porvoo</a></b><br />
The second oldest town in Finland is notable for its colourful river-lined houses, local artists and delicious food. With medieval cobblestone pathways winding through coloured house-lined streets, Provo is a perfect day trip outside of Helsinki. We took a bus to the town and spent the day walking through the town, stopping in at cafes, thrift stores and shops. The food in Porvoo was excellent, I highly recommend eating at <a href="https://www.zum.fi/" target="_blank">Zum Beispiel</a>. Scattered throughout the town are little sweet shops - my mom bought some sugar donuts and we also stocked up on some crunchy chocolate treats. Between the residential area and the town's main courtyard is a beautiful old church that I highly recommend going to if you're an architect junkie (like me).<br />
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<b><a href="https://www.suomenlinna.fi/en/fortress/" target="_blank">Explore Sea Fortress Suomenlinna</a></b><br />
This 3000-year-old UNESCO heritage site is the perfect day trip. Easily accessible by the ferry, located near the docks in Helsinki, the island is a walkable slice of history with preserved catacombs, cannons, fortress walls and heritage museums. Suomenlinna is also a residential area with working artists and other civilians. We walked the entire length to Kings Gate and had a pizza lunch in an underground cafe.<br />
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<b><a href="http://caferegatta.fi/in-english/" target="_blank">Stop for a snack at Cafe Regatta</a></b><br />
Cafe Regatta is a cute little waterside cafe. Painted red with eccentric design choices, the cafe offers up warm drinks, desserts and some salty snacks. On our first evening in Finland, we stopped in here after exploring the <span style="background-color: white;">Töölö</span> neighbourhood in the warm evening. If you want something salty ask for a sausage - you get to grill it yourself over the outdoor fires!<br />
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<b><a href="https://www.restel.fi/tilat/mestaritalli/" target="_blank">Restaurant Mestaritalli</a></b><br />
About a 30-minute walk from Regatta is Mestaritalli, a simple restaurant with a deck that overlooks the water. Since we had left our apartment so late, we decided to eat dinner here before heading out to the city to explore. The staff are all friendly and the food was beautiful, fresh and colourful. I had the smoked chicory root with lentils and my mom and sister had salmon (the bread was delicious).<br />
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<b><a href="https://fi.espressohouse.com/coffee-shops/" target="_blank">Grab a coffee at Espresso House</a></b><br />
Their version of Starbucks but better; this coffee house chain offers all your caffeine must-haves as well as dairy-free milk alternatives. My go-to was an oat milk latte or matcha latte. Oat milk is the new everything.<br />
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<b><a href="https://www.airbnb.ca/rooms/24801368?euid=303a6d90-7609-82f6-a792-48e2e97228b1&locale=en&_set_bev_on_new_domain=1568741931_B43yEzKqbGdcQozg&source_impression_id=p3_1568741934_vZ08KGtZ%2B7p22U6I" target="_blank">Rent an Airbnb near The City and Sea</a></b><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">We loved our little apartment in the <span style="background-color: white; caret-color: rgb(72, 72, 72);">Töölö area with close distance to both the city and the waterside. </span>I think it's always good to stay in apartments since it helps you feel like a local, you get a better travel experience and the option to cook your own food. This two-room apartment was a 10min tram ride from the city centre and I highly recommend it and the area to anyone.</span><br />
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<b><a href="https://helsinkifarmersmarket.fi/" target="_blank">Stroll through the Farmer's Market</a></b><br />
Down by the docks and the ferry boarding lies the lovely Helsinki Farmers Market. The vendors sell traditional Finnish treats, handmade goods (I bought a hat), artisan crafts and accessories as well as more traditional souvenirs. Farmers also sell their fresh produce (get the peaches) while the pop-up eateries serve hot plates and take-away meals.<br />
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<b><a href="https://www.birgittahernesaari.com/" target="_blank">Have dinner and go for a walk at Birgitta Hernesaari</a></b><br />
Located on the Baltic Sea, this rustic restaurant serves up simple food made well. My sister and I had the caesar salad with salmon and my mom had a burger. We shared a bowl of potatoes and I highly recommend you do the same, they are a salty crispy delight. We took the bus from our apartment and spent the evening eating and walking by the sea. It doesn't get dark in Finland until about 12am, so people are out and about enjoying the slow-setting sun and warm weather.<br />
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<b><a href="https://www.paulig.fi/kulma" target="_blank">Kulma Cafe</a></b><br />
Located in the Design District, Kulma is an excellent place for food, drinks and a break at any time of the day. This two-story cafe is light and airy with fun hammock-style chairs on the upper level. The cafe serves amazing open-faced sandwiches (I recommend the avocado and kale pesto sandwich) and offers vegan, gluten-free and dairy-free options; I would say almost all of the places we ate offered vegan, gluten-free and dairy-free options.<br />
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In the end, Finland was more than I ever expected. From delicious food and coffee to stylish shops and interesting architecture. My mom, sister and I made so many memories and also a few bruises LOL. Thanks for reading everyone, stay tuned for my Estonia blog post coming soon!<div class="blogger-post-footer">All Opinions Are My Own!</div>Kayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3957465572861863837.post-25822415304229398082019-09-05T19:16:00.004-04:002022-11-23T18:39:53.134-05:00Dear Diary: The Final Cancer Diagnosis<div><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjx-rxkk2pjzoTJEcsF7wk-EiaDB-3ki3C_LrDHiLuJb98It5vfKMrK8j-vGszLOhZPs0wK7asG3HtqQpGnLppRldTuT3OAv_diO2jFvN1GwArbOlGtARAXrsCWzIdmWja0FwkIdnvFrOc3NVGM4pOyTyyXGW2oG1pCI47YuXICJmQTTNR03LbvvM1e/s2240/blog-banners-%20(3).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1260" data-original-width="2240" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjx-rxkk2pjzoTJEcsF7wk-EiaDB-3ki3C_LrDHiLuJb98It5vfKMrK8j-vGszLOhZPs0wK7asG3HtqQpGnLppRldTuT3OAv_diO2jFvN1GwArbOlGtARAXrsCWzIdmWja0FwkIdnvFrOc3NVGM4pOyTyyXGW2oG1pCI47YuXICJmQTTNR03LbvvM1e/w640-h360/blog-banners-%20(3).jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br /><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></b></span></div><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b><span style="background-color: white;">December 6, 2014</span></b></span><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></span>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">The last 2 weeks have consisted of me having two CT scans, a PET scan, a bone marrow biopsy, a MUGA test (heart test), a pulmonary function test (breathing test) and 10 tubes of blood, I finally have a final diagnosis.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">My oncologist has diagnosed me with: <span style="border: 0px; font-weight: 700; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">stage 3, type 1A</span> <span style="border: 0px; font-weight: 700; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Classical Hodgkin's Lymphoma (HL)</span>. Staging works by looking at where cancer lives within the body. Stage 3 means that there are active cancerous lymph nodes on both sides of my diaphragm. Before my PET scan, I was diagnosed as stage 2, but after the scan, the Dr. found a small lymph node outside my spleen that was also active. Type 1 means that all my organs are negative for cancer, it is just active in my lymph nodes outside of my organs. Type A means I have no symptoms. My bone marrow biopsy came back negative, meaning that there is no spreading or aggressive cancerous activity in my blood! </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">So far, I have been told that this is a good diagnosis, and Hodgkin's Lymphoma is a very curable cancer regardless of the stage. I don't if that is supposed to make me feel better.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">My Oncologist and I discussed my treatment, which will include:</span></div>
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<li style="border: 0px; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">6 cycles of ABVD chemotherapy (2 sessions per cycle/month)</span></li>
<li style="border: 0px; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">6 months approximately of treatment</span></li>
<li style="border: 0px; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">After the chemo is finished, another CT + PET scan is to see if all the active areas are gone/ if I need to consider radiation for anything remaining</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;">I’m feeling really confident about everything. I start my first day of chemo (5 fucking hours of joy) next Tuesday. </span></span><span style="font-family: inherit;">Wish me luck!</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>ALSO READ:</b></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.thisinfernalracket.com/2019/02/lymphoma-diaries-before.html" target="_blank"><b>Before</b></a></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b><a href="https://www.thisinfernalracket.com/2019/06/bone-marrow-biopsy.html" target="_blank">Bone Marrow Biopsy</a></b></span></span></div>
<div class="blogger-post-footer">All Opinions Are My Own!</div>Kayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3957465572861863837.post-55314268444784780542019-09-04T08:53:00.002-04:002022-11-23T18:43:00.434-05:00Moving Forward 5 Years After A Cancer Diagnosis<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-286OdHdPXow/XWh9KfiGpaI/AAAAAAABICQ/GntrI_CNYdMSZdqxF-KxHM1tJEpPrBXqgCLcBGAs/s1600/LRM_EXPORT_1036593581548514_20190829_212727042.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="640" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-286OdHdPXow/XWh9KfiGpaI/AAAAAAABICQ/GntrI_CNYdMSZdqxF-KxHM1tJEpPrBXqgCLcBGAs/s640/LRM_EXPORT_1036593581548514_20190829_212727042.jpeg" width="480" /></a></div>
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I feel like I am stuck between two worlds. It's been almost 5 years since I was first diagnosed with cancer. 5 years of good and bad. 5 years of changes. 5 years of learning how to live again.<br />
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I wonder or sometimes feel that I am moving away from my cancer....but is that even possible? Does moving forward mean growing apart from this disease? Can I ever leave cancer behind? Part of my life still feels like the cancer patient, with appointments and side effects, but the other part, the part that beats steady, is yearning to move forward and reclaim something new.<br />
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And so, I find myself at another crossroads.<br />
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-UzsLgkZ1IwI/XWh9Tr54hII/AAAAAAABICc/bTlPj8vZorsAYZfqyM5i8HvOvvDqd-jMQCLcBGAs/s1600/LRM_EXPORT_1036588815196060_20190829_212722275.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="640" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-UzsLgkZ1IwI/XWh9Tr54hII/AAAAAAABICc/bTlPj8vZorsAYZfqyM5i8HvOvvDqd-jMQCLcBGAs/s640/LRM_EXPORT_1036588815196060_20190829_212722275.jpeg" width="480" /></a></div>
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This year I turned 26. I have been 'cancer-free' for 3 years. I feel that I am very much into my survivorship, focusing on my personal growth, healing emotionally and physically, and learning how to not overextend myself by saying no (to things I would have always said yes to, or holding myself too accountable for every action and reaction). I am building a sustainable and mindful routine and making time for moments either with myself or others. I am trying to understand how to survive and thrive at the same time. Since my cancer diagnosis, I have had so many positive changes in my life that have helped me grow as a human. However, post-traumatic growth is not the same as resilience. Resilience is about people returning to their previous level of function after some event in their life. Post-traumatic growth refers to positive personal changes in someone's life. I don't really think I have reached my previous level of function, but do I want even want to be who I was previously?<br />
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If I look at my life I can say that my relationships with others have improved, my experiences in life have been very fulfilling and I appreciate every little thing so much more. My personal strength has really developed and so has my physical strength. I started anxiety medication and I can honestly say that it has helped clear the clouds out of my mind, giving me a chance to feel whole and human. For me, those small steps have all been attributed to my ability to move forward. Each morning I wake up, and instead of thinking about cancer, I am thinking about my day, what I might do, and who I plan to see. I am thinking about my own happiness.<br />
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So....can I actually let go of my cancer? Can I be just Kayla again? Something so huge in my life for so long is now shrinking. The aftermath of cancer is very much present but the "I had cancer" statement is not really at the forefront of my mind anymore. I didn't think a life without cancer could exist for me...but maybe it can.<br />
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And so again, I am at this crossroads of feeling happy but not fully feeling fulfilled. I don't think cancer will ever be fully out of my life. It lurks in the corners of my mind and I am reminded of this disease almost daily in some small way or another. How can I survive and thrive as I continue on with my life after cancer? What does moving forward really mean? Is there a <i>Moving Forward Checklist</i> I can refer to I honestly don't have an answer, I don't know what to do and there are no words of wisdom other than this is a process. Healing takes time, there is no set speed and not every answer is everyone's answer.<br />
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If you have any tips for moving forward, please share them below for everyone to read.<div class="blogger-post-footer">All Opinions Are My Own!</div>Kayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3957465572861863837.post-5834004516584153882019-08-15T09:10:00.004-04:002023-05-15T09:41:53.508-04:00Tips For Loving Your Body After Cancer<div class="gmail_default" style="background-color: white;">
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-tsoUZukZ17o/XVVVWceITuI/AAAAAAABG9Y/saAn19cnE8A_dBGv99SkQguQHzDk-YMaQCLcBGAs/s1600/LRM_EXPORT_94331824471051_20190815_084254839.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="640" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-tsoUZukZ17o/XVVVWceITuI/AAAAAAABG9Y/saAn19cnE8A_dBGv99SkQguQHzDk-YMaQCLcBGAs/s640/LRM_EXPORT_94331824471051_20190815_084254839.jpeg" width="480" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">What is self-love? How do we define it? How do we encourage it? Maybe it's the words we speak to ourselves. Maybe it's the expectations we hold ourselves to. Maybe it's the food we do or do not put into our bodies or the clothing we wear. Maybe it's the time we take for ourselves. Maybe it's all those things, an understanding of your self-worth and happiness. Now throw cancer into the mix. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Cancer can change the way you look. </span>Chemotherapy can<span style="font-family: inherit;"> cause your hair to fall out and your body to swell. </span>Radiation can burn your skin. Surgery<span style="font-family: inherit;"> leaves scars. These are just a few of the changes that can affect your personal self-esteem and how you view yourself and your body. I know </span>that<span style="font-family: inherit;"> I went through all these things and it really took a toll on my mental health. I lost all my confidence and my sense of self. I was supposed to be starting my life as a young adult, but instead, I had to deal with cancer and its path of destruction.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Also, Read</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.thisinfernalracket.com/2019/04/favourite-skincare-products-after-cancer.html" target="_blank">Favourite Skin Care After Cancer</a></span><br />
<a href="https://www.thisinfernalracket.com/2018/02/spring-into-spring.html" target="_blank">Spring Into New Routines</a><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">2019 has been the year of working on self-awareness; being aware of what I want and need, and learning to love the after-cancer me. I do pretty well but I have my moments of despair. Last month I found a photo of myself that someone else has taken, I noticed my thinner hair, my damaged arm, my dryer skin and some extra weight. It sucked, I'm not going to lie. I felt defeated in that one photo like it somehow captured all my flaws and shared them with the world.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I expressed my struggle with self-love on social media and met with support and thoughtful messages. </span>Some of you reminded me that I am more than a moment captured on camera. My life and story are shaped by who I am and who I want to be. Something I am still trying to work on is being kind to myself. I<span style="font-family: inherit;">t's okay to fall as long as you get back up and keep moving forward. Acknowledge the feeling, and then move on from it. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Tips for Loving Yourself After Cancer</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">During my recovery, I've gone through many stages of love and hate with myself. A huge part of that struggle came with adjusting to my body and dealing with my wardrobe, weight gain and of course having had cancer, twice! I found ways to cope over the years and so, here are some of my tips for adjusting to a new body and a new life after cancer.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-variant-ligatures: none; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;">1. Go through your closet. Try everything on and separate them into things that are too small/big, things that almost fit, and things that do fit. Consider the pieces that almost fit. Can they be adjusted or do you just need a belt to hold up the pants? If there are some pieces you absolutely love then find ways to reincorporate them into your outfits. </span><span style="letter-spacing: 0.1px;"><br style="font-variant-ligatures: none; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;" /></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0.1px;"><br />2. For the clothing that no longer fits, allow yourself to remember the memories from the pieces. I remember keeping my pre-cancer clothing for 2 years after I was cancer free. Finally, I took them out, basically said thanks for the good times, and put them into a bag for donations. I realized I'd probably never wear these clothes again, and I was holding onto an old version of myself that no longer served me in this new life.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.1px;"><span style="font-variant-ligatures: none; white-space: pre-wrap;">3. Cut yourself some slack and allow yourself some personal space to be sad and then make peace with your body, your scars and your future - scars do not define you, but they do tell your story of heroism. One of my biggest insecurities is my left arm due to an infection and permanent skin and vein damage. Over time, I learned that these scars are not to be ashamed of, I didn't need to hide under big sweaters and t-shirts, and now I can wear tank tops and dresses without constantly looking in the mirror. </span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.1px;"><span style="font-variant-ligatures: none; white-space: pre-wrap;">4. Find an activity, exercise or program that inspires you and interests you. Swimming, y</span></span><span style="font-variant-ligatures: none; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;">oga and lifting light weights help me feel stronger and more confident. It's also a good distraction from my own mind. I also love blogging and vlogging, sharing my experiences and outlook in life with others.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-variant-ligatures: none; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;">5. Get a makeover! After 25 years I finally decided to dye my hair, get a new cut and pamper myself. The new hair and fresh skin really boosted my confidence. Maybe for you, it's buying a new pair of jeans, going on a weekend getaway or having a fun photoshoot. Do something that makes you feel refreshed. Dedicate time throughout your life for yourself; decide what you need and then go do it. </span></span><br />
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.1px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">These are a few things that have helped me cope with my changing body after cancer. I still struggle with self-image, worth and feeling confident in the body that cancer left me. On my good and bad days, I remember that this body has beat cancer, twice, and that itself is amazing.</span></span><br />
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.1px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">What are some things that you do for your new body after cancer? Let me know in the comments below!</span></span></div>
<div class="blogger-post-footer">All Opinions Are My Own!</div>Kayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3957465572861863837.post-49134664891840211592019-07-26T09:24:00.000-04:002019-09-05T19:00:52.377-04:00My Favourite Vegan Green Goddess Dip<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-vvEm6RYLdrs/XTpAXoA4cbI/AAAAAAABFXo/zTwQwqYGkEURVq063hd1Tc86zUWPU0JLQCLcBGAs/s1600/DSCF1890.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="426" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-vvEm6RYLdrs/XTpAXoA4cbI/AAAAAAABFXo/zTwQwqYGkEURVq063hd1Tc86zUWPU0JLQCLcBGAs/s640/DSCF1890.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #202124; font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;">The original recipe is by the amazing <a href="https://www.theglowingfridge.com/spicy-magic-green-sauce/#_a5y_p=6007012" target="_blank">Shannon Leparski and The Glowing Fridge</a>. She has some amazing recipes on her blog so go check it out!</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #202124; font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;">This dip is a party favourite and has gotten me a ton of compliments at social gatherings or dinner events. What I love the most about this dip is how versatile it is; you could use this for taco night, on eggs in the morning or an avocado toast base. It's also great on chicken or fish, veggies or salad, on a sandwich, and even as a pasta sauce (weird but it works). </span></div>
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;" /><span style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;">This sauce is packed full of so many delicious flavours, each one with a shining ingredient full of vitamins and healthy fats. I am obsessed with fresh herbs and often grow my own every summer. I love being able to use my own produce to make something for my friends and family. </span><br style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;" /><br style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;" /><span style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;">The recipe is simple and you can easily change bits if you have certain preferences. I like a little heat so I usually incorporate more hot pepper than called for. The great thing about cooking is that once you have the ingredients and understand flavour combinations, you can easily adapt recipes to meet your needs. To be honest, many times I don't follow recipe measurements, I just buy the ingredients and wing it; I think I have a decent pallet...no one has complained yet :p</span></span></span><br />
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-1MpVmhh4NeE/XTpAZw7OpII/AAAAAAABFXs/yEpC2dtQm68huowydN77BTXwa5Oe2mtUQCLcBGAs/s1600/DSCF1896.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="426" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-1MpVmhh4NeE/XTpAZw7OpII/AAAAAAABFXs/yEpC2dtQm68huowydN77BTXwa5Oe2mtUQCLcBGAs/s640/DSCF1896.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-mWtwdHPDcDM/XTpAcRHQtcI/AAAAAAABFX0/gKSA0mt57SkshAfH71B4pXAvN0SB7uhRwCLcBGAs/s1600/DSCF1906.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="426" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-mWtwdHPDcDM/XTpAcRHQtcI/AAAAAAABFX0/gKSA0mt57SkshAfH71B4pXAvN0SB7uhRwCLcBGAs/s640/DSCF1906.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;" /><span style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;">The original recipe is by the amazing <a href="https://www.theglowingfridge.com/spicy-magic-green-sauce/#_a5y_p=6007012" target="_blank">Shannon Leparski and The Glowing Fridge</a>. Here is my adaptation with a few changes that suit my preferences!</span><br style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;" /><br style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;" /><span style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><b>Ingredients</b></span><br style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;" /><span style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;">1 Avocado, ripe</span><br style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;" /><span style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;">1 cup Basil, fresh</span><br style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;" /><span style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;">1/2 cup Cilantro, fresh</span><br style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;" /><span style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;">1/2 tsp Garlic</span><br style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;" /><span style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;">1 Jalapeno </span><br style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;" /><span style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;">1 Lime (juice)</span><br style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;" /><span style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;">1/2 cup Parsley, fresh</span><br style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;" /><span style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;">2 Scallions</span><br style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;" /><span style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;">1/4 cup Tahini</span><br style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;" /><span style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;">1/2 tsp Black pepper</span><br style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;" /><span style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;">3/4 tsp Pink Sea Salt</span><br style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;" /><span style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;">1 tbsp Rice Wine Vinegar</span><br style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;" /><span style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;">3/8 Cup Water (or to the consistency you want)</span><br style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;" /><br style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;" /><span style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><b>Instructions</b></span><br style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;" /><span style="color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;">In a food processor, combine the avocado, basil, cilantro, parsley, vinegar, and water. Blend it together until your desired consistency (I like to see the green flecks of herbs and keep mine thicker - the more water you add, the thinner it will get!).</span></span></span><br />
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-zH7JctAre1w/XTpApqOYUdI/AAAAAAABFYA/x2aLryBRJhgha6DWnKrYbg3rolQWxhZPACLcBGAs/s1600/DSCF1919.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="426" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-zH7JctAre1w/XTpApqOYUdI/AAAAAAABFYA/x2aLryBRJhgha6DWnKrYbg3rolQWxhZPACLcBGAs/s640/DSCF1919.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #202124; letter-spacing: 0.1px; white-space: pre-wrap;">Add in the tahini, jalapeno, lime juice, scallions and salt and pepper to taste. Blend it up and serve to your guest, or to yourself. It will keep for a few days in an airtight container! Let me know what your favourite way to eat this sauce is in the comments below!</span><br />
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<div class="blogger-post-footer">All Opinions Are My Own!</div>Kayla Trembletthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11051540572099977732noreply@blogger.com0